Pass The Brink of Insanity
by khkrazy
Summary: Yet another day in this hell hole for the mentally insane...another quiet boring useless day. Well that was until they dragged the redhead in here kicking and screaming and shoved him in my room.
1. Chapter 1

**New story..again...I'm not even done my other stories but whatever I like writing and I have a million stories swarming around in my head and i have to write them out so here ya go**

**Disclaimer:Not my characterss :/  
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Chapter 1

"Roxas!" called the older looking man

"Yes." I answered

"It's time to go."

"Huh?" I asked stalling for time

"Roxas this is not the time for games, I'm not hardly in the mood, get up and lets go." he said standing in the doorway

"If you would just tell me what you want perhaps I could comply."

He rolled his eyes and walked over to me, I moved back holding up my hands in surrender.

"Alright, alright you got me I'm going, keep your scrubs on."

I walked behind the burly man down the hallway to the end stopping in front of the dark wooden door.

"Alright here you go." he said turning on his heels "Have a good session."

I sucked my teeth before knocking lightly on the door hoping she wouldn't hear me and then I could just go back to my room. No such luck, she quickly came and opened the door.

"Hello Roxas."

I sighed "Hello."

I followed behind her as she went into her office "You're not gonna turn on the silencer?" I asked in reference to the white little noise maker that sat outside the door in an attempt protect my confidentiality.

"That depends, are we gonna talk today."

I shrugged.

"Fine then." she said bending down to flip on the small contraption.

"So how are things Roxas." asked the brown haired woman leaning back in her leather chair.

I crossed my right leg over my left and then my left leg over my right.

"Fine,I suppose."

"Anything you want to tell me?"

"Nope."

"Okay, let me rephrase that, is there anything you _should _tell me."

"Not a thing."

"You're a habitual liar, so you can understand my apprehension."

"I do."

"Alright then, even if you don't talk were still entitled to sit here for the entire hour."

I shook my head "I'm well aware of the policy."

She sighed "Then wouldn't it be easier to actually talk."

"About what? The weather...I wouldn't know, I haven't been outside in two weeks because you had me put on probation."

She leaned back crossing her arms, I smiled. "Crossing your arms...obvious defensive body language, why so hostile?"

She nodded "You learned that from me no doubt."

"True, so its careless of you to show such obvious emotions don't you think?"

"Perhaps, but maybe, just maybe it was my intent to get your attention."

I chuckled lightly "Well if that _were _the case I would commend you for being able to manipulate me into talking, but foolish to reveal your plan. No?"

"Perhaps."

And the silence set in again.

"We have 45 minutes left, so that means I have to use two more psychological tactics to get anything out of you."

I just nodded.

"Ah...so I see, now you wont talk."

I stared her directly in the eye relentlessly giving way to no emotion. She sighed again.

"Okay...then we'll sit again."

And so we sat for the next forty-five minutes, me looking out the window and twiddling my hair and finally the hour was up.

"We've reached that magical time Roxas."

I nodded "Lovely, how about do this again next week." I said sarcastically

She forced a plastered smile onto her face as I exited and walked into the common area.

"Hey Roxas." said a faint voice behind me, I looked at my other blond friend and sighed. Poor Demyx, they obviously had to sedate him, again.

He seemed dazed and distant. "Hey...hey Dem you okay buddy?" I asked quietly

"Mmmhhmm..just kinda sleepy." he answered leaning back in his chair

My shoulders dropped and I walked over to me and Demyx's other friend, Namine. Me her are very similar,not just in the sense that we look alike but were both quiet and not to mention neither of us are really crazy. I mean so I lie a little bit here and there who doesn't right? And well Namine, they call her "A danger to herself." But to here her tell her she's a dare devil. She rides a motorcycle does crazy drugs and sleeps with a new guy every week. She the kind of life fast and die young kinda girl, and apparently we were both lucky enough to have parents who think these are legit reasons to ship us off to a nuthouse.

"What ya drawing?" I asked her leaning over to see her sketch book

"Naked guys." she said flatly

"Again?"

She turned to me placing down her sketch book down on the table. "I've been her for how long?"

I looked up trying to think "Six months."

"Do you know how hard it is going that long with hot sweaty passionate _sex."_

I leaned back with a smile "I don't know what to tell you."

A smirk spread across her face as she leaned in close "How about you meet in the supply closet and help me take the edge off."

I shrugged "Sorry sweetheart, you're beautiful and all but I'm hetero phobic."

She scoffed and leaned back "You always find a great way to shut me down don't you Rox."

I nodded "Just trying to keep things fresh."

She let out a wistful sigh and returned to her perverted drawings.

I laid back on the plush couch closing my eyes settling in for another dreary day at this wretched hell hole I had learned to call home, such is Lenitvi Prati.

"Get your god damned hands off me you dirty fucking pansies!" yelled a gruff voice causing me to shoot straight up. My eyes drifted towards Namine he was staring intensely with labored breathing. I followed my eyes over a rampaging red head kicking and screaming with anger burning in his electric emerald eyes.

"You come any closer to me with that mother fucking needle and I'll claw your eyes out."

"Get him out of here!" yelled the attendee

"I will murder you all you shit mongers...fuck you all." he yelled his voice growing louder and and louder

More attendees rushed him forcing him to the floor and rushing to his arm with the needle, one finally got close enough only to have the redhead turn at the last moment making him miss the vain.

"You dick fuck! You stabbed me you evil son of a bitch! Get the hell off me! I am not crazy!"

Those were the last word we heard him say as somebody finally reached a vain knocking him out almost instantly. I watched in awe as six attendees carried his limp body down the hall.

I scrunched up my face before sitting back down "What a lunatic."

Namine sat down looking dazed "What a man."

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**A/N: Lying Roxas, Sex crazed Namine,Axel and Demyx with problems yet to be discovered. I think we have ourselves a story folks**

**Btw the name of the place is Lenitiva Prati which means soothing meadows in Italian  
**

**Review please my lovelies :D  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Duudeee thank you guysss! so many people put alerts and faves and reviewed I was just like whoa O.o...I did not expect this reaction so here you go another chapter and sorry they're so short I'm trying thought okayy thankss again XDD**

**Disclaimer-They aren't mine :'(  
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Chapter 2

"Well that was interesting." I say leaning back onto the plush couch

"Yeah the first real action is months." said Namine dejectedly

"Well after that I'm sure it'll be a while we actually see him."

"You say this because?"

"After an episode like that it'll be a miracle if he ever gets out of solitary."

Namine let her head drop "Fuck..." she mumbled

"I hate this fucking place." she said discarding her sketchbook

"We finally get something entertaining and worthwhile and they keep it locked away."

The way she was talking you would've thought it was a child being deprived if a new toy till Christmas.

The main clocked chimed signaling the new hour.

4:00

Namine sighed "Alright my turn with the bitch...wish me luck." she said as she stood to go to her session.

She had been well behaved lately so she was allowed to walk to her therapy appointments without an escort. I on the other hand had caught "distorting the truth" and was put on probation for two weeks. I wasn't even allowed outside during breaks anymore. But it wasn't just Namine's therapy session why we hated 4:00, it was also because it meant that our very limited freedom was drawing to a close because at 5:00 they serve dinner and dispensed meds .And after we had all been fed and drugged it was off to our holding pens until we started the sickening cycle again. I wandered around somewhat watching TV and flipping through Namine's sketchbook, anything to kill time until the next hour when the clock chimed again and Namine headed back down the hallway with her usual "I hate that bitch" look on her face. She flopped down next to me angrily.

"One of these fucking days I'm gonna reach across her desk and staple that bitches eyes shut."

I looked at her blinking rapidly

"Then they'll have a real reason to keep my ass in here."

I watched as the attendees stood up to escort us troubled clients to dinner. I looked up over to my left to see one of greatest dangers.

Marluxia.

That man is crazy was with a capital C. He's schizophrenic and the voices tell him some seriously perverted shit. Like why couldn't he hear normal crazy people thought like killing babies, no he hears people telling him to flash us all and nonsense like that. Although I suppose rape is better than death.

But enough with my nonsensical ramblings, on with dinner.

Dinner always had and always will be complete shit. So when we sat at the table I had very low expectations but I was even disappointed when I saw what they gave us. To be completely honest I had no clue what it was so I poked at a few times before I slid the plate away. Namine picked up a spoonful and sniffed it.

"Hey Demyx?" she asked

The blond looked up "Hmm?"

"You feeling up to a race?" she asked with that mischievous devil's look in her eye.

My fingers gripped the bridge of my nose as I lowered my head and waited for what was to come. Namine and Demyx were gonna have one of their infamous fear factor races. The tradition started a while back when we had a particularly bad dinner and Namine decided to make a competition out of it seeing who could shovel down the slop fastest. It was so gross. But Namine got an adrenaline rush from and so therefore it stuck. I watched in horror as the two packed down the rubbish. Watching them eat like wild animals just further sickened my already irritable stomach. I leaned back as Namine slammed her fork down declaring herself the champion.I shook my head in disgust. A staff member walked over and hovered over me.

"Not eating again Roxas?" he questioned

I just sighed "Is that a crime?"

"It is if it for attention."

I rolled my eyes, here's the thing with these people, the make a diagnosis out of everything. It must by attention starved liar complex why I'm not eating dinner,yeah that's totally it. Seriously though, all sarcasm aside...where do they get this shit?

"Alright if you won't eat then you have to go in your room." he said sternly

I looked at him like he was stupid, I was gonna end up there anyways what kind of punishment was that.

"Alright."

And with that I was escorted to my room to probably read and then go to sleep, God this place was boring. With this being said you can imagine the shock on my face when I got to my room and on the bed across from mine was a redhead. Like seriously red. Bright fiery red and green like you could lost in them so deep amazingly green eyes.

I looked around nervously "Hi." I said taking a few steps into the room

"Hey." he said solemnly. Though I couldn't blame him. This place had that effect on you.

I took a few more steps in weary of what he might do, but upon further inspection I realized who it was . Crazy dude from earlier, the one with the whirlwind of curse words streaming from his mouth and the needles his arms. Then I looked confused.

"So are you staying in here permanently?"

"Yup."

I couldn't understand, how did this dude not have solitary after the performance he put on earlier,although he seemed normal now.

"So umm..whats your name?" I asked sounding stupider than I intended

"Axel...yours?"

Okay he was asking me a question, now this was a semi normal conversation

"Roxas."

His face lit up slightly "That's cute..I'm gonna call you Roxy."

My face twisted into a quizzical expression "...Orrr you could call me by name."

His smile dropped almost instantly "No...I'm gonna call you Roxy."

The seriousness on his face made me drop the subject, maybe he was bipolar.

He laid on his bed looking me up and down while I stood awkwardly in the middle of the floor.

Sei gay sì? he said finally breaking the silence and I would have answered him had I any idea what he said

"What?"

"You're gay...yes?" he asked

I looked down with a light laugh "That obvious huh?"

Non ti preoccupare ... prende uno per conoscere uno

I sighed "What language are you speaking?"

"Italian...I said, don't worry takes one to know one."

Well at that I had to smile just a little because I was very sure he was coming on to me.

"Oh okay so you speak English and italian?

He nodded

So then why make my life difficult, why not just speak english."

"Perché io sono già convinto che il tuo viso è confuso sexy"

I rested my hand on my hip, now he was just being an ass.

"All I heard was sexy."

He shrugged "That's all that mattered."

I rolled my eyes not sure whether I was pissed or turned on...probably both.

Then a thought hit me...Namine is gonna be so disappointed.

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**A/N: First off this is not Namine bashing I like Namine. Secondly I love italain Axel so yes I will make him speak italian.**

**Translations**

**Perché io sono già convinto che il tuo viso è confuso sexy**-Because I'm already convinced you're confused face is sexy


	3. Chapter 3

**Yay! A new chapter! I'm gonna be honest theres no actual plot development I jsut needed a filler to get down some personlities, mainly Roxas's. Okay..so thats that...R&R**

**Disclaimer-If I owned KH the yaoi wouldn't be implied it would be intentional...furthermore proving I don't own KH/Square Enix  
**

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That night when I laid down it was really hard to not stare at Axel. Now don't go jumping to conclusions thinking its because I'm obsessed with him, that's not hardly the case. What it really is the entire time I've had this room to myself and now just like that about 5 feet away from me is some bilingual lunatic, are you seeing my issue? So I'm laying on my side which is super uncomfortable but its the only way I can lay where I'm not forced to see his face. But I can feel the presence of another human being hovering...okay I'm being dramatic he's not hovering. Not in the the slightest, he's sleep, I think but I refuse to turn around to find out. I'm dying to move, I want to fidget a bit just to get the energy out of my system but then he might know I'm awake, that is if he himself is still awake but I don't know. Finally I can't take it anymore I'm going crazy, I have to move, look at anything besides this wall, I roll over and have a mini heart attack.

Green

That was all I saw, emerald green eyes piercing through me.

"Can't sleep?" he asked nonchalantly

My hand rested on my chest trying to calm my heart. "The fuck?" I questioned more out of fear than curiosity

"Scared you?"

"No shit sherlock ." I said rolling on my back

"Guarda che il linguaggio blondie"

I flipped over quickly I narrowed my eyes "Don't you dare call me blondie."

He rolled over propping himself up his elbows "Don't you even want me to translate for you?"

"No...not really."

He chuckled under his breath

"Fine than I won't."

I felt my jaw clench, after he brought it up and podded at it _of course _I wanted to know what he said .

Then I watched a smirk gradually spread across his face "You wanna know don't you."

In rolled my eyes "Go fuck yourself." I said before laying back down to try and go to sleep, but it just wouldn't happen. I just laid there in the silence staring at the wall.

I let out an exasperated sigh, this was ridiculous.

"Just give up...if you force yourself to sleep its never gonna happen cause you're brains gonna be going a thousands miles a million thinking about trying to get to sleep and then you'll be awake cause you're thinking."

At first I scrunched up my nose irritated by the fact that he thought he should interject his advice on me but then once I mulled it over, it made perfect sense.

"Fine." I answered sitting up "So what do you suppose I do."

The redhead shrugged "Talk to me."

And the way he said it was normal with a trace of some underlying tone that I couldn't quite pinpoint.

I leaned back with my arms folded, in truth I wasn't annoyed but I barely knew the guy, plus I'm a master at body language.

I scoffed "Talk about what exactly?"

He put on a very serious expression, If I weren't me I would have genuinely believed he was thinking about what he was going to say but I can spot acting a mile away no matter how good it is, and so I called him on it.

"Stop pretending like you're thinking and and ask your question."

He raised an eyebrow not seeming fazed but I knew I had caught him "Why are you here?" he said flatly

I looked up, my eyes naturally wanted to drift down but I concealed my embarrassment by covering it with pondering.

"My creativity." I said locking my eyes with his, again he didn't falter which kind of annoyed me.

"Seriously."

"Honest to god truth."

He snorted "Okay then, define creativity."

"Good with words."

He bit his lip,no doubt stifling a laugh when I saw a flash of metal.

He opened his mouth to speak but I cut him off "You're tongue is pierced?"

"Yeah." he said plainly hanging his tongue out for me to get a better view.

"Now...before you changed the subject-"

"I did not!"

He held up his hands as if to silence me"So you're a liar?"

My eyes looked onto him with an calm expression before leaning closer and removing my folded arms

"No."

Remember kiddies its all about body language.

"That's what a liar would say."

I shrugged "So then there's really no way to prove it is there?"

"Guess not."

"So...why are you here?"

"Pass."

"This isn't a game...answer the question.

"No."

"I answered yours." I said giving a little more emotion than intended

"By you're own free will, Its not my fault you're wiling to divulge that kind of information to a stranger."

I literally snapped my mouth shut, I was the champion at mind chess and right now this redheaded stranger, this Axel had me in check.

Time for a new strategy

"Good point, my own fault." I said walking over to the window, it was small and about 6 feet off the ground. Without looking at him or giving him any reason to believe I was looking at him I shimmed up to the ledge propping myself in front of the window. Not 100% sure my plan was working I started talking.

"In about an hour or so the greatest thing about this place will happen." I said quietly

"And that is." he asked after a while.

"The sunrise." I answered matter-of-factly

"The sun rises at 6." he said

"I know."

Its 6 now."

I shrugged "Oh."

Like I didn't already know that and so he did just what I expected, he walked over where I was and peered into the glass except he was tall enough to stand and look in the window.

Now he was next to me and he actually was hovering, I just had to hold out for a few more minutes.

And then nature favored me and the sun began brimming above the horizon. I watched as the glow reflected in his eyes. He stared not moving or blinking and I knew I had him.

"Bet you never seen anything like this where you're from."

"Not at home but on the sea." he said softly like if he spoke any louder the whole world would shatter

"The sea?"

He broke from his trance and stared at me before lifting the sleeve on his left arm to reveal a tattoo written in Gothic script.

"Eat & Drink today fore we die tomorrow."

I looked up him with sincere confusion shrouding my features

"Marines." he said

I nodded, fighting back a smile, something about the intimacy of a sunrise in these dark halls made a man spill his guts,it must be the comfort of it all. Or so I thought until his preceding statement.

"You play lots of games Roxy," he said turning and walking away

"consider this one a freebie, but remember... you can't win every time."

I didn't even bother feigning stupidity because I knew I was caught. So I made a mental note.

Axel-1

Me-0

But this wasn't over, not by a long shot.

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**A/N: See told you Rox was a schemer...I jsut had to actaull;y showww you :D now you understand..since this was a filer I shall try to update ASAP...much lovvee**

**REVIEWW! Thank you kindly **

**Translations:**

Guarda che il linguaggio blondie-Watch that language blondie


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay...another chapter..lovely...umm...for those of you who might be reading "Can't live without you." sorry ive been gone so long...I got wrapped up in this but Ill update real soon.**

**Disclaimer:Go talk to Square Exix and Disney  
**

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Two hours later I sat at the breakfast table with my head in me hands at which point Demyx came over with a cheerful smile on his face.

"Morning Rox."

I nodded at him

"You look horrible." he said worriedly

"Don't worry Dem I just didn't get much sleep."

"So...what happened yesterday?" I asked knowing full and well what I could be initiating

"What do you mean?" he questioned his voice dropping slightly

I backed away regretting that question "Nothing." I answered quickly

I saw him twitch slightly like he heard somebody whispering in his ear.

"No Roxas..." he said his voice getting progressively lower

"Dem?" I asked nervously

"No...Roxas."

My eyes widened, I did not need this 8:00 in the morning after a sleepless night

"Dem..Dem...not right now please." I asked taking hold of his wrist

His eyes scanned mine rapidly like they were looking for something. Thats when Namine came over with a panicked look, she was watching Demyx closely. I felt the weight of my recklessness settling in.

"Dem?" she called and he didn't turn to her

"Myde?" he asked again

The other blond turned his head slightly, not enough to face her,just slightly

She knelt down on one knee clutching his hand "Dem...Demyx...come on buddy..stay with me."

He dropped his head in between his legs gripping locks of his hair while letting out a growl of frustration.

She sighed and rubbed his back "Okay...its alright Demyx...right...its fine Demyx" she said emphasizing his name time and time again

He slowly calmed down releasing his grip on his hair slowly rocking back and forth soothing himself.

As he slowed to a stop Namine looked up at me while she was still on the floor before getting up and sitting next to me.

"What happened."

I bit my lip "It was my fault."

"What happened?"

"I was trying to ask him why they sedated him yesterday...not my best idea."

She leaned back and rolled eyes "No fucking shit...that was just plain stupid Rox...what did you think was gonna happened. If "Myde" came what would we have done huh?"

I looked away sheepishly "I dunno"

"Think sometimes."

For those brief seconds when we were wrapped up in Demyx's mental insanity I forgot that I was going to have to tell Namine what happened, well at least some of it.

"Hey Nam-"

"Lets go get breakfast." she said standing and walking down the corridor to the hallway, despite my wishes I followed her piecing together what I was going to tell her exactly. We came into the cafeteria a to grab the personal cereal boxes and cartons of milk. Breakfast on weekends was serve yourself. It was a miracle they trusted us with styrofoam bowls .She sat across from me eating her frosted flakes.

I poured my milk slowly getting my thoughts together.

"Hey Nam...guess what?"

"You know I despise guessing games." she said with a mouth full of cereal

"Remember the red head from yesterday."

"Hells yes!" she proclaimed

Okay now he's gay, and get myself killed, so we pick answer C. Something else!

"Well hes not in solitary."

She leaned in with her face way too close to mine

"Don't toy with me little boy...are you sure."

"Positive." I said

"How?"

"I saw him"

Some of the best lies are the ones that are partially true.

"Where?" she grilled angrily

"In the hall with an attendee."

Namine looked at me her face void of emotion. Thus we began our relentless staring contest as she scanned my eyes for sincerity.

"Omigosh...I think you're telling the truth."

I shrugged "I try to do that every once in while...you know just to keep things fresh." I replied sarcastically

"Ok...so where is my man-meat?"

I crinkled my nose "Ew."

"Don't judge me...you don't know what its been like..."

I tilted my head to the side, surely she didn't think she was the only one.

"Really Nam."

She leaned back looking at me "I think I'm worse off then you."

I chose not to argue since the lie I had just told put in a pretty compromising situation. Sometimes I actually thought they might be right, that I might be a habitual liar but when I reflect on it, what I say is always justified. This was just to spare Namine. And so I was content with what had happened and was prepared to move on with my life,well that was until...

"Roxy!"

My heart literally stopped and sank to the bottom of my stomach. My eyes moved from the floor to Axel's emerald orbs. I didn't look at Namine because I knew the second he said my name I was fucked.

He sauntered over and sat down on the table.

"Hello blondie...and girl blondie." he said looking over at Namine

"What you're name." he queried , she leaned back shifting gears seamlessly, from angry to sexy in .5 seconds.

"Namine." she said in a mid octave, sensual yet sweet voice, I really did love her sometimes. She was a master of manipulation and a bitch too. Now don't look at me like that, she calls herself a bitch alt least 13 times a day, she says its a good thing.

"Cool...cute name." he said stretching out across the table top, I moved my cereal to my lap to keep him from knocking it over.

"And yours?"

The name's Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?"

A saw a faint smile appear on her lips "Definitely, consider it memorized."

Okay so maybe she wasn't mad that it didn't tell her how well I knew Axel, maybe she would let it go.

"So what are we gonna do today?" asked the redhead

I looked over at Namine, her face was sweet and calm even slightly inquisitive. Or so the average person would think...but at a very low frequency, just enough so that could catch them she was radiating death waves

I was fucked.

"I'm not sure." I said softly, I'm not gonna lie, Namine frightens me.

He sighed "What is there to do here."

Namine scoffed "Nothing."

Axel jumped up quickly "I refuse to believe that!"

"Well its true." I said

"Fine...if threes nothing to do then I should at least get to know you guys."

Obviously Namine had no objections.

"Okay...we should go in rounds we ask a question and we all answer it...oh we should get more people.

This is the point where my apprehension began.

"Whose is that." he said pointing to a silverette fondly know as Riku.

"Riku." answered Namine

"Whats his deal?" asked Axel

"Suicidal." said Nam calmly

"Okay, hmm him?" he said pointing to Marluxia

"Schizo."

He nodded

"Him." his hand facing Zexion

"Zex...mute."

"Hm...him?"

"My BFFL Demyx...ummm multiple personalities." she said

I could tell she almost didn't want to tell him, Demyx was sweet and one of the best friends you would probably ever have, but Myde...was the polar opposite.

"Alright...well lets get them all over here."

Namine and I raised an eyebrow. Hers with intrigue mine with fear and confusion.

"Sure."

"Are you out of you're fucking mind?" I asked

"Supposedly...or I wouldn't be here." she said sweetly.

I watched in terror as the two rounded up not just the aforementioned people plus a blond girl named Larxene, an older man with an eye patched who went by the name Xigbar, and a rather high spirited girl who reminded me of a chipmunk named Yuffie. Some how despite the "Issues" all 10 of us gathered around in a circle on this fine Saturday afternoon and had a lovely time getting to know ea ch other.

Okay...that complete bullshit...heres what actuallyhappened

"Okay whose first?" asked Axel

"Oh! Oh! Me! Me! Mememe! Pick me!" yelled the raven haired girl lifting her hand high in the air.

"Okay...you go...first question and every body has to answer. What your name?"

"Easy...Yuffie."

And so proceeded to go around the circle saying our names, the only good thing that came out of this activity was what was once believed to be a mute Zexion spoke.

"Okay...next person." said Axel giving this Larxene a chance to ask any question she desired and have it answered by us under the pretense that when our turn came she would return the favor.

I was starting to notice a pattern in Axel.

"Okay..lets skip all the boring questions in the world like favorite colors and foods and get right to the good shit..hmm...sexual orientation."

My.

Fucking.

God

Was she serious?

We were two damn seconds into the game and this bitch was gonna get me killed. Now I guess you're thinking how could Axel being gay get _you _killed Roxas. Its simple really

Namine is one crazy bitch.

Surprisingly enough most of us were either gay or bi

Riku-Gay

Zexion-Bi

Xigbar-Bi

Yuffie-Straight

Demyx-Gay

Namine-Bi, she says this way she increases her chances of nailing somebody...that girls libido

Me-Gay, duh!

Marluxia-Bi,of course, pervert

Larxene-Straight, A shock right? would've guessed I was sure she was at least B

and then came my ultimate doom.

Axel-Gay

Namine's eyes flinched for just a second before she looked at me. I swallowed hard, her death trays were very obvious now, everybody saw it.

"You okay Namine?" asked Riku

"Fine." she gritted out

And the questions continued down this _glorious _path for a long time. Riku then felt the need to ask about our favorite sex positions. While Xigbar asked us the longest we've ever lasted. Marluxia asked us the kinkiest place we ever did And you wouldn't believe some of the weirdo shit we heard, like apparently Riku did it in a bush, Demyx did it in a Sauna room and Larxene in her parents bed.

Ew.

I thought things had reached their absolute worse and that things could only go up from here But that was before it was Zexion's turn. You would never know what a perv this kid was considering he had never spoke until this day. Personally, I think the world had planned for Zexion to break free of his shell on this exact day and be lively and sociable just to ruin my life. I expected something normal, I expected him to be the shining light but no...you wanna know what he said.

"Who do you have fantasies about?"

I don't so much blame Zexion for the question as I blame Axel for his answer.

"Isn't it obvious...I'm all types of crazy for Roxas."

Oh yes...he went there.

I just met him and he apparently has dreams of the erotic kind staring yours truly. How is that possible, he didn't even sleep last night.

What is this?

So I blinked a few times in confusion before clearing my throat.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me..its all about you sweetie." he said this before flitting his eyes between me and Namine quickly and elusively, nobody seemed to notice the little tick but me.

Of course.

"I don't know if he feels the same..." he said dejectedly and I was completely shocked until he said

"but its okay..cause you can't win all the time."

In my head I heard bloodcurdling cries and breaking glass. I turned slowly and nonchalantly to face him and he just smiled cute little crooked smile before proceeding on with this sick game. He was good. Really good. So good Namine didn't notice that this game wasn't just a one-sided hobby for me, but an all out war. All the while she stared me down.

See.

Told you I was fucked.

And yet another mental note

Axel-2

Roxas-0

But I felt a comeback in the near future.

* * *

**A/N: Oh a circle of sharing...the things we learn...also sorry for the lack of italian Axel. :/  
**

**anywayssss I'm now going to momentarily plug a two-shot two you...I personally beta-ed my friend's story and vice-versa..but this was like an epic two-shot...only the first half is up but you're gonna wanna check this out..its Seiner(SeiferXHayner) very under appreciated couple and an awesome story**

**.net/s/6539560/1/The_Emperor_and_the_General**

**Annddd now that im done...REVIEWWWW! Cause you know you wanna touch that button...go onnn give it a clickkk :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yay! New chapter! I'm happy...its like actually developing a plot(I think) lol ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer- Go talk to Square Enix and Disney**

**Also thanks to Gluckliche Katze who pointed out that "technically" Demyx really has split personalities since he only has one other persona...ooopss. **

**And thanks to EVERYBODY who reviewed and put on alerts and favs...its amazing to see the support for this story, it makes me so happy and motivated. :D**

* * *

Chapter 5

Well of course right after that Namine pulled me aside.

Believe me it, was brutal.

She grabbed me by my arm taking me away from the group and took me into a corner. She stared at me for a while without saying anything, she just stared on expectantly like she wanted me to speak first. When I didn't she looked at me angrily while clenching her hand into a fist.

"What the fuck Roxas!" she yelled punching me in my arm.

Hard.

"What?"

"Don't act fucking stupid!"

"I'm not."

"What do you call it?"

"What?"

"Just stop..."

"Just...?" I trailed off unsure of what else I could possibly say.

"Why would you do that!"

"Do what?"

"Just give a straight damn answer!"

"Ok..."

"Why lie to me Roxas... _me_... of all people?"

Okay, she had me there.

"Sorry."

She just put her head down.

"Another lie?"

"No... I'm really sorry."

"Am I just some judgmental bitch to you...? Somebody not worthy of telling the truth too?" she said looking up me with piercing blue eyes that strangely resembled my own.

"Nam... You know its not like that at all."

"Hmm... and you expect me to believe you _now."_

Again... She made a valid point.

She shook her head.

"Listen Nam... I'm sorry."

She looked at me with slight frustration before her face just relaxed into disappointment and she walked away with a scoff.

"Yeah... sure you are."

I leaned back, resting my head on the cold wall.

I felt so horrible which was weird for me, not that I'm void of emotion, but I just generally don't care about other peoples bitching and whining. But to see Namine with that look on her face it really hit home for me.

Axel and me were gonna have a problem.

Correction.

Me and Axel have a problem.

I stormed away from the corner Namine had boxed me into, to go and find Axel. He was over on the other side of the room conversing with Riku who appeared to be his new BFF.

"Axel..." I said walking up to him.

He turned away from a Riku with a smile on his face, like they were in the middle of a joke.

"Yes love?" I looked at him like he was crazy.

What the hell was this guy's problem?

"We need to talk." I said as calmly possible considering my growing anger.

He started walking calmly in front of me towards the room, like he was completely oblivious to why I was angry.

"Don't act so oblivious." I said through clenched teeth.

"What?" he queried feigning innocence.

He was such an ass.

He walked into the room holding the door open for me.

"After you honey."

I was going to kill him. But not until we got in the room. The last thing I needed was to make some damn scene in front of all the attendees and have me have my ass sedated and dragged off to solitary.

I stormed in after him and slammed the door behind me.

"Do wanna explain what you were trying to accomplish?" I questioned trying to remain calm.

"What are you talking about?"

I breathed in deeply trying to maintain my composure.

Stay calm Roxas, just stay calm I told myself.

I let out slow breaths before I spoke

"Stop this right now! What we do is what we do... but don't drag my god damned friends into it!"

"What are implying?"

"Stop being an idiot!"

"_I'm _the idiot?"

"Yes... You're the idiot... and everything you do further proves my point!"

"You know what, you're right... you're not an idiot, you're nothing but a fucking little kid who makes up fairy tales and plays games."

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about so shut you're mouth!"

"Lower your voice." he said sounding annoyed.

"Don't you dare tell me what the hell to do-"

"Watch it."

"No you watch it-"

"Roxas... shut up." he replied advancing towards me.

"Who do you think you are!"

"You started this... so look."

"No... you look bitch!"

In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have said that.

Once he gave me that face I regretted it.

He looked at me with such massive anger.

I genuinely feared for my life, and for good reason.

He rushed over and grasped me by my throat, picking me up about a good two feet off the ground and shoving my back against the wall, my head banged it slightly making me a emit a slight 'umph'.

"Don't you ever!"

My eyes looked over his... behind his emerald eyes was a trace of some unknown emotion. He leaned in close to my face.

Too close.

His breath ghosting over my lips as his jaw clenched tightly.

Then he murmured something... something too low for me to catch.

"You understand! Don't you ever... Call me out my mother fucking name!"

I could physically feel myself shaking every inch of my body trembling in fear.

It was the scariest thing I had ever seen.

A thin layer of cold sweat prickled on top of my skin as he proceeded to yell at me while keeping trapped again the wall. I was pinned so tightly I couldn't even move.

"Cagna come te mi fa star male!" he shouted.

I had no clue what that meant, but it couldn't be good.

I wanted to say something... but I was scared positively shitless.

"Do you under-fucking-stand blondie? Il mio nome è Axel!"

I nodded furiously as my feet hovered above the ground, with my head growing dizzy, spinning from the lack of oxygen.

"Axel... Axel... please."

"Don't even try to beg for mercy... Perché non dovrei ucciderti adesso."

"A-Axel..." my voice barely a whisper.

"You think you know everything, but you don't. You don't!"

I squirmed underneath his grip, my vision blurring over.

I was sure he was gonna kill me right there and then. I didn't even bother wasting my remaining breaths in further pleading.

He furrowed his brow and dropped me angrily.

My limp body fell down quickly on an angle making me land on my ankle. It let out an earth shattering crack which was promptly followed by a very unmanly scream from my throat.

Axel did a complete 180, his features changing from anger to raw fear.

"Roxas? Are you okay?" he yelled bending down to look at me.

Do I look okay! I just broke my damn ankle! Or at least that's what I would have said if I hadn't been crying like somebody died.

"Roxas... Roxy... I'm sorry."

The predatory growl had left his voice. It was calm, concerned... and even a little worried.

What the hell was this guy's problem?

I sobbed heavily my chest heaving up and down. I wanted nothing more than to get a damn grip on myself and stop bawling in front of this... this... whatever the hell you want to call him.

"Roxy... you want me to go get somebody?"

"Why the hell... would I... would I want somebody... some-somebody in here!" I yelled between heavy sobs.

He looked at me, guilt plaguing his features.

"Roxy I'm sorry." he answered quietly, "Want me to put you on the bed?"

"N-No!" my voice squeaked in fear of the pain that was sure to come.

"I wont hurt you... please let me just get you on the bed."

I sniffed in slightly, my eyes red and my ankle throbbing.

"NO! Don't touch me!"

"Roxy... Roxy please."

"I said, don't touch me!"

"Please..."

I sighed before nodding in agreeance.

I haven't a clue why I was trusting him so much. I blame the searing pain.

I closed my eyes tightly as I felt him lift me off the ground, and against my strongest wishes my arms wrapped them selves tightly around his neck.

Now don't go imagining this the wrong way.

First and foremost I still hated him. And secondly I couldn't be any less concerned with him considering how much my ankle hurt.

I hissed out in pain as he gently placed me on the bed before taking a seat on his watching me closely.

"I can get you some ice."

I laughed under my breath quietly, almost manically.

"Axel... were in nut house where we can't even have our own shoelaces. You can just go reach in the fridge and grab some ice."

He looked at me with a determined look.

"I'll be back." he upon said standing, "With the ice."

I laid my head back as he he closed the door behind him. I replayed that sequence in my head over and over analyzing each part of it in detail.

What the hell did I say that deserved to be choked? Had I offended him just that much? Or maybe he just a seriously short temper...

I looked up when I heard him coming through the door with a triumphant look on face.

"Ice." he said bending down on the side of the bed placing it on my ankle softly. I let out a faint hiss of pain as he held it on.

"Look." he said averting his eyes, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Yeah. Sure."

"I really didn't, I just... lost my temper."

I just shook my head and closed my eyes, I was at a loss for words. Not to mention I was scared.

What was to stop him from doing it again?

Nothing, that's what.

With my eyes closed and the silence of the room flowing into my ears I slowly felt sleep coming over me.

But not before I heard Axel saying something quietly to my what he thought was my sleeping body.

"I didn't mean it, I'm sorry, I don't know what it is about you. You take my emotions too the extremes, you've seen so much of me in less than 48 hours. You're driving me crazy Roxy.

He let out a defeated sigh and I tried my hardest not to open my eyes.

"Io non quello che sto per fare con voi" he said before placing a kiss on my forehead.

I kept my eyes closed as he headed to his bed.

My. God.

What is this guy's problem?

**

* * *

A/N: So...sorry about the violence if it upset you**

**Translations:**

**Cagna come te mi fa star male!**-Bitches like you makes me sick

**Il mio nome è Axe!-** My name is Axel

**Perché non dovrei ucciderti adesso-**Why should I not kill you right now

**Io non quello che sto per fare con voi-**I don't know what I'm gonna do with you

REVIEWW!

Beta'd by BLub271~ much love to her :D


	6. Chapter 6

******HELLLOOOO! Im BACCKK! Sorryy guys I know you must be going crazy waiting for me to update this story but my computer was broken...its fixed now and so the story will be back to regular update status**

******I was gonna try to do a double upate but I was so anxious to post this I couldn't wait until I finished the other chapter...**

**Disclaimer-Talk to Disney and Square Enix :/**

**Also a thanks to KitsuneNoSeiza who gave me the translations for this chapter! :D**

* * *

Chapter 6

Once again another sleepless night. I was really afraid to even breath, you didn't see Axel. Those green eyes burning with anger and hatred it was terrifying, not to mention the searing pain of my ankle. I laid there staring at the ceiling contemplating what the hell made me think I should have said that too him and everything else that happened today. Like the fact that Namine is officially not my friend any in short, my life is ending bit by bit. My stomach lurched when I heard shuffling and mumbling on the other of the room. My heart started racing erratically.

Oh god god no.

He's awake.

He was awake and moving.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I was just so damn scared. But I finally manged to turn and take a faint glance at him. He was pacing back and fourth in the small area of our room with his head down and a fistful of his hair mumbling to himself. Now I was intrigued. Still scared, don't get me wrong still scared as hell, but intrigued as well.I sat up just slightly trying not to make any sudden movements as he continued pacing in his little elliptical pattern while tugging on his hair and mumbling to himself. I just don't understand why they had to put him in _my _room. I swallowed hard squinting to see him in the dark room. I licked my excessively dry lips, I could literally hear my heart beating in my chest.

"A-Axel" I stuttered

He just kept pacing and mumbling to himself.

I cleared my throat

"...Axel?"

More pacing and louder mumbling, he began running his fingers throughout his hair quicker looking down at the floor pacing in the small area.

"Axel...Axel?" I questioned raising my voice, when I quickly clamped my hand to my mouth in fear of what would happen after yelling at him.

His head snapped up quickly and I physically saw the light return to his eyes,

Scary shit.

"You just don't understand." he said his voice almost a whisper.

What have I done?

"You can't protect yourself...but neither can I...you have to understand that or he'll get you."

"What?" I asked nervously

"Somebody here will keep you safe. Don't worry buddy." he said, and then he did something really scary.

He smiled.

The sweetest most genuine smile you can possibly imagine. For that entire instant I forgot how crazy he was and just saw the sexy ass man standing before me. Then he ruined it. I watched as his chest started heaving slowly and then quickening in pace he clutched his hand to his chest. My first thought was oh my gosh he's having a heart attack. But then he dropped to his knees with a loud thud gripping a his legs, clawing at them with his hands.

"Non è colpa mia!I cant fucking help you!"

My eyes widened.

"Make it stop! Fallo smettere di gridare! Please! Please! Im so sorry." he yelled his voice breaking.

I felt a cold sweat break out on my skin. And my breath grew shallow, cause the scariest thing was that _he _was crying. What the hell did I do to deserve this? I had seen about four different sides of Axel within three days, quite frankly I had seen enough.

"Make him fucking stop! Damn it!Fermalo!" he yelled

My eyes darted quickly as I heard the doorknob twist and an attendee came running in. Don t you just love how he damn near killed me and all was fine but he cries on the floor and they call in the mother fucking troops. I tell you. Its outrageous,but anyway. The man bent down trying to see Axel's eyes, I give him credit for bravery.

"Axel." he asked calmly

"I already tried that." I thought but I decided to keep it myself .

"Axel?" he asked again

" Volevo aiutarti...Mi dispiace " he whispered

I damn sure wanted to know what he was redhead spun around quickly grasping the attendee by the shoulders.

"Can't you make him stop? I can't deal with the sound of his voice!" he said more tears steaming down his face, his head dropped as his chest heaved up and down.

"...Please, just make him stop." he begged

The attendee looked over at me, I just shrugged.

"Alright Axel...I'll make him stop...just come with me."

The redhead stood up slowly following him out of the room. "I can't hear him anymore...it hurts too much."

I just watched in awe as Axel calmly allowed himself-. No as Axel voluntarily walked out of the room practically arm in arm with the damn attendee. For hours after that I just laid there still unable to sleep. I mean the man had made me a goddamnned insomniac. Seriously I have gotten like 5 hours of sleep in the last three days. I just tossed and turned and eventually I must've fallen asleep because next thing I knew I was waking up, I rolled over to find Axel's bed still empty which didn't come as much of a surprise considering he did have a complete break down last night but still, I guess I was just... wishful thinking. But aside from that, everything was normal, including the overwhelming pain in my ankle it just hurt so damn much. I stood placing my hand on the head board to balance all of my weight to one side, to be honest I had no clue how I would last through the day but slowly and patiently I managed to make my way out of the room and into the corridor leading to the dining area, believe me it was the _last _place I wanted to be but If I didn't eat it would just get me more trouble, so grudgingly I struggled through whatever the hell the breakfast was, some kind of oatmeal... maybe.

Whatever it was the point is I was miserable,absolutely miserable. Day in and day out this what I did and each time I turned the knob to go into my room a little portion of me hoped to Axel laying on that bed but each day I was let in this monotonous routine 15 days had passed. To be honest I actually missed him. I don't know how that possible, I didn't know him. didn't really know any one side well enough to assess if I even like him. Well that's not entirely true, I had gotten up close and personal with his angry side, I was still sporting the limp to prove it, thought when I went to see the the lady in the infirmary she told me it was just a hairline fracture. Thank god. But it was still pretty bad, she had actually gotten me some crutches though I barely used I was sitting there bored out of my mind just left with my thoughts I wondered what exactly _was _wrong with Axel... bipolar, maybe. Who the hell knew. A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts.

"Roxas!" called the attendee.

I rolled my eyes, I just wasn't in the fucking mood.

"Yes?" I answered

"Its time to go."

I sighed and stood walking towards the door, I was allowed to go to my appointments by myself now with my crutches. Fun.

I hobbled down the hall and through the common area I spotted Namine sitting with Demyx and Marluxia, I scrunched up my nose. Now what the hell is wrong with this picture, how about one pink haired schizo sitting in _my _seat. That's what! I scoffed and headed down the hall knocking on her door.

"Come in." she replied

I rolled my eyes opening the door and taking a seat across from her.

"So...how are things?"

"No silencer?"

She sighed before standing and flicking on the minuscule machine.

"So...how are things."

I leaned back. "I don't know." I said looking out the window, I was off of probation but I still hadn't been out on account of the bum leg.

"Really?" she asked trying to mask her surprise in the lack of my flat line answer.

"why don't you know?"

"There just a lot of things that are different."

"Like?" she asked encouraging me to continue in conversation I decided I might as well.

"Like..." I wasn't sure she needed to know about Namine she damn sure didn't need to know about Axel.

"Just my routine in general." I finished

"Hmm." she said scribbling on her notepad

"Care to elaborate?"

"Not necessarily."

"It figures...well heard you have a roommate."

Surely she knew Axel had been gone for over two weeks, so what was her angle.

"Yes."

"How are you two getting along?"

What the fuck is her deal.

"As well as can be expected, but you said yourself, I'm not a people person."

"Very true."

She just stared me down, most likely waiting for me to say "Hey don't you know Axel is gone."

Nuh-uh. Not gonna happen.

"Well Roxas, we only have 20 minutes left, anything else."

"Nope I'm done."

"Do you wanna tell me why you are suddenly so talkative."

"Nope."

She sighed "Okay, I'll just take what I can get."

"How about we end early?"

I narrowed my eyes at her

"No trick Roxas, no ploy, no scheme, no angle. I just want to end early."

I stood "Alright then, I'll see you next week."

"Very well, goodbye Roxas."

I left closing the door behind me. That was weird. Maybe she knew something I didn't

* * *

**A/N: Where is Axel? Oh noooo! Lol jk everything is fine(Probably not) hehe...now I'm just fucking with your head! :D**

**Beta'd by BLub271~Much love to her**

**REVIEWW! :3**

**Translations(Italian)**

**"Fallo smettere di gridare"-"Make him stop screaming"**

**"Stop him" -"Fermalo"**

**"It's not my fault"-"Non è colpa mia"**

**"I wanted to help"-"Volevo aiutarti"**

**"Sorry" -"Mi dispiace"**


	7. Chapter 7

**Not as quickly as I would have wanted to update but an update all the same...here ya go**

**Enjoy**

**Disclaimer-Talk to Disney and Square Enix**

* * *

Chapter 7

Another week. Fun.

I'm really starting to hate my life... Well, I've never been a huge fan of it anyways but things are getting exceedingly worse. You know that whole "Taking things for granted" bit had really came back to bite me in the ass. Cause right now I am _majorly _missing Namine. But, what am I supposed to do I have ultimately been replaced.

Yes, you haven't heard? Marluxia has replaced me, and not only has he replaced me he has positively responded to each one of Namine's advances. Its creepy as all hell, cause they are inching ever closer to being "an item".

Disgusting right? That's what I said. And to add insult to injury, figuratively of course, I miss Axel. Like legit miss him. Crazy right? Like I said, I'm really starting to hate my life.

It's lunch time and I am dreading having to go out there, Marluxia and Namine are sickening to watch and I just feel everybody's eyes on me. It drives me absolutely crazy. Okay, maybe they aren't all looking but I damn sure feels like they are, but that's nothing new. I'm always being watched. But I digress, sooner or later they were gonna come in here and make sure that I came out to eat. I felt like one of the eating disorder patients being closely monitored for food consumption.

My life.

The faint knock on the door interrupted my thoughts.

The attendee peeked his head in.

"Hey Rox... you gotta come in."

"Hmm good I can't wait for da eats." I said with my best impression of a hillbilly.

He just rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I'm sure... just come on."

I sighed rising off the bed placing my I-pod down. Oh yeah I didn't tell you, I got to restored to full privileges the other day I'm officially mentally stable enough not to choke myself with the headphones. That's reassuring right? With each passing moment I find it harder and harder to go on with my pathetic excuse of a life.

So I walked to through the line and grabbed my food.

A sandwich... hmph... I might eat it.

I was contemplating condiments when I felt a presence near me.

Namine... Namine?

"Umm... hey." I said uncertainly.

"Hey Rox... what's up?"

I looked around nervously.

"... Nothing."

"Oh that's cool... I heard you got restored to full privileges."

We don't have much to talk about around here so even little things spread fast.

"Yeah, got the I-pod today."

"Awesome." she sighed, I did the same.

Our heads both turned away avoiding eye contact.

"I miss you." we said simultaneously, blue eyes sparkled.

"Really?" she asked placing her hands on my shoulders.

"Yeah." I answered.

"Yeah it really sucked without you, I don't think there's a single person in the place with an attitude as bad as yours."

That's actually a compliment.

"I know."

"Good... bring your shit lunch and come sit with us 'kay?"

I smiled.

No apology, no arguing, no talking it out. This is why me and Namine worked.

Heartless, blue-eyed, blond haired demons. It's the seemingly innocent that can't be trusted.

What I wasn't looking forward to was sitting next to Marluxia. Insert shudder here. That dude gives me major chills, but if Namine was dealing with him then maybe I had missed something.

Probably not.

I'm an amazing judge of character, I highly doubt that in had overlooked any normalcy in that guy.

Grabbing my tray I followed behind my once again best friend who I had missed like crazy in these last few weeks and set next to her across from Marluxia who looked at me weirdly.

"You guys are friends again?" he asked turning to Namine.

"Yup." she said flatly without making eye-contact.

Same old Namine.

The pink haired man looked at me crossly before turning his eyes back to Namine. "So he apologized."

"For what?" she asked looking at her tray.

He just raised an eyebrow before shrugging and looking at his own plate. "Nothing I guess." he mumbled.

The rest of the lunch was incredibly awkward, it also lacked Namine's usual sexual innuendos. And every now and again I would look over to see Namine's hand in his.

I coughed slightly into the the crook of my arm looking at the two of them.

She pulled her hand from his using it to push the hair out of her face. Marluxia look over sending me a dirty look.

This was absolutely torturous.

We struggled through the hour and I was actually relieved when they told me it was time for me to go to my session. Well, I won't go so far as to say relieved because I was always annoyed when I had to see that bitch, but at least now I was out of an extremely uncomfortable situation.

I reached over and hugged Namine before standing up to leave.

"See ya tomorrow Rox." she said.

"Yeah, see ya." I said as I tried to not to look at Marluxia.

That man had it out for me, I could feel it.

I slowly ambled towards her door sighing as I raised a hand to knock, she appeared at the door opening it for me which was just slightly unusual.

"Roxas." she said flatly.

"Yes, it is I, the wonderful and magnificent Roxas." I replied stepping pass her as she flipped on the silencer.

More unusual still.

"Sit." she commanded.

I leaned back crossing my arms over my chest. "Why so hostile?"

She looked at me with a blank stare. "Sit." she said again.

Defensively and growing more and more annoyed I sat on the couch as she sat on the large arm chair across from me.

"Roxas since you've got here we've played by your rules."

"They're fair ones though."

"Listen."

I looked on as she stared me down.

"You didn't tell me Axel left."

"Thought you knew."

"You purposely let me believe you knew nothing."

"You did the same."

"I have patient confidentiality to worry about."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"I'm sick of this... we tried it your way. Now I want answers."

This bitch had lost her mind.

"Why lie about Axel hmm?"

I shrugged.

She slammed her hands down on the arms of the chairs. "Dammit Roxas I'm not doing this again with you!"

I swallowed thickly. It was like my first day all over again.

"You are not the same person!" she yelled.

I looked away, I could feel the anger pulsing through me as my heartbeat pounded into my ears.

"Say something!"

I kept my eyes to the floor.

She scoffed, "When they brought you here you didn't speak." she said quietly.

"And when you finally did you told me you didn't wanted to be that person anymore."

I bit the inside of my cheek. God I wished she would shut-up.

"I helped you Roxas. You are not the same person, I did this for you."

"You didn't do a motherfucking thing but keep your mouth shut!" I yelled snapping she was walking into a disgusting place.

"And this is the thanks I get?"

I clenched my teeth together. "You get nothing from me."

"You owe your life to me! I tried to help you! And you turned into this!"

"So I'm sort of monster now?" I yelled standing, "I don't want to hear this anymore."

"You sit down!"

"Or what?"

She laughed under her breath. "Okay... Sora."

My left up twitched upward as I advanced to her.

"...What... wh-what did you call me."

"You're the same... just keep on running like you always have."

I felt tears stinging my eyes, "You don't know what you're saying."

"Does Axel know?"

"Shut up."

"You have feelings for him don't you?" she asked smugly.

"Shut the hell up."

"Like you could ever love anyone."

She always did know how to push my buttons, I was heating up and my vision was blurring I was almost positive I was going to loose conciseness.

"Shut up." I growled taking a closer step to her she stood in front of the chair.

"You look angry."

I breathed slowly out of my nose.

"If your father could see you now."

That was the last straw.

Next thing I knew somehow I was standing above her banging the stapler into her chest repeatedly with all my might little sprinkles of blood dotting her blouse as she yelled hoarsely for help. I let a throaty shout rip from my lungs as the attendees wrapped their hands around my arms dragging me out of her off my shoes scuffing the shining tiles.

"You will die you evil spiteful bitch!" I spat as I struggled against them trying to get back to her.

I wanted to finish what I started.

"You will die! You fucking hear me you manipulative bitch? You have done nothing for me! I am who I am because I chose to. I owe you nothing but a death sentence!"

The wind was knocked out of me as another attendee came pushing me onto the floor. I inhaled heavily trying to put air back into my lungs.

"Let it be known that I will only rest until your blood is shed! You will die!"

I looked up my eyes wildly scanning the room to see Namine's eyes on me. The needle pierced my vein as the cooling liquid spread through me and suddenly the roaring in my ears was slowly silenced as my eyes faded to black. My last thought as I drifted from reality was...

Isn't this ironic?

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**A/N: I feel like this was bound to happen eventually...and here it is**

**Also I have a poll for this story on my profile pleasseee vote cause this story can take 2 vert different paths depending and I can't make up mind...thanks a mill**

**Review if ya want**


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry I haven't updated in forever. I know I'm sorry there's a full reason on my profile. So yeah...sorry

**Disclaimer-Talk To Square Enix and Disney**

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Chapter 8

So this was solitary. Four padded walls on a soft shag like carpet, and one single bed. This sucked so much. I was definitely going crazy, and what made it worse since there was nothing to do all I could do was think and worry and think. I kept replaying her evil words in my mind.

"_If your father could see you now."_

I hate her.

"_Okay...Sora."_

How dare she?

I was pass that, I had moved on. She of all people should know that, I do give her credit for not telling on me. She even helped me but now...well now I knew she couldn't be trusted. I leaned my head forward on the soft wall. That was probably the nicest thing about this room the fact that every square inch was so damn comfy. I sighed and flipped on to my back, laughing to myself. I was laughing about how she looked like flopping fish as I slammed the stapler into her chest. Every cell in my body hoped at least one of those staples went straight to her black heart.

I twisted finding another position. Lying face first.

There was nothing to do. God, it was torture. And now once I got out of here I would once again be taken back to stage 1. No privileges, being escorted everywhere, not being allowed to go outside.

Dammit.

After all of this she needed to be dead. Cold in her motherfucking grave. I tell you staplers should be more sturdy, all office staplers should have the strength like a stapler gun.

Oh, that would be nice.

I squinted and sighed.

That sounded awfully morbid and just the slightest bit violent. Solitary makes people crazier then they already were because you have nothing else to do but sit and dwell on the deepest parts of your mind. And just as I was thinking of all the things deeps in my brain I remembered something.

Axel was here somewhere in this section of the hospital.

I smiled to myself. Why I don't know, but I did. A while ago I had started missing him, missing him more than I should and I had this overwhelming urge to find out just how close he was to me. Because I knew he was here somewhere. And for some reason I knew I needed to see him.

Ridiculous right?

Then what part of this situation wasn't ridiculous? I sat up and crawled onto the small bed staring up at the ceiling. Between the fluorescent light and all the white this place was blindingly bright. I just stared my eyes shifting in and out of focus. When the steel door creaked open.

"Roxas." called a voice.

I didn't move because it sounded distant...yet familiar.

"Roxas. Rox."

I tossed and sat up sightly looking at a strange figure that blurred in front of me.

I squinted as they became clearer "Roxas."

"Yes." I answered my voice sounding foreign.

"Get up."

"What?"

"You can't stay here...get up."

It was like I couldn't understand what he was saying. What the fuck was going on? I was fine just a moment ago.

Then I sat straight up with my clothes stuck to me with sweat looking around wildly.

Fuck. I had been dreaming. Scary shit man.

I looked down at the cold tile floor.

Maybe it was the pills giving me these weirdo dreams.

Resting my head into my hand I let out a long sigh. The door creaked again catching my attention, I was very sure I was awake this time.

"You're up." said the attendee with a saint southern accent.

I just stared on blankly.

"Me and you have to go for a walk.." she said pushing back her blond hair.

"Because?"

"You're a danger to yourself sitting in here all alone just... thinking."

I scoffed, she had that right. "What? I don't get any sugar coating... politically correct. Nothing?"

She smiled, "I've read your charts. You shoot that down faster then a one-winged bird."

"Fine... where too." I said standing.

This room was annoying me anyway.

"Just up and down the corridors a few times. 'Kay hon?"

I furrowed my eyebrows.

Did she seriously just call me hon?

I shrugged off the thought and nodded in agreeance.

She opened up the door leading me out into the hallway, I looked around to see identical steel doors lining the hallways. She peered down to the other end looking nervous. She was up to something and was incredibly bad at hiding it.

"What or who are you looking for."

"No one sweetie." she answered plastering on a fake smile.

"You're talking to a habitual liar or did you miss that part on my chart?"

She laughed lightly, "Just... walk this way." she said inching towards the corner.

I heard the sound of keys jingling lightly and she stopped. "As a matter of fact, lets just stay here."

Now I was scared. What the fuck was going on here?

I watched closely as a male attendee rounded the corner, he held up his hand behind him as if he were signaling somebody to stop.

"Is he with you Jackie?"

The dark haired attendee nodded. I looked at her but she didn't look back though I could tell she felt my eyes burning into the side of her face.

The man turned behind him. "You've got 30 minutes. I owe you nothing else, me and her will be over there just out of ear shot. Don't do anything stupid."

He looked at Jackie as the two of them walked around the corner of the dim lit hallway, I looked over as a tall silhouette appeared from the shadows. My eyes widened and I forced back a smile as I saw Axel appear in front of me. Was I still having medicated induced dreams? Who the hell even cared at this point. But then the logical portion of my brain kicked in. If were in solitary how the hell would Axel be here? Who were those attendees? Why aren't we caught for being in the hallways?

Yup. Definitely a medicated dream, I guess I would be waking up soon.

"Where's the enthusiasm? Didn't ya miss me Roxy."

I looked down biting my lip as he inched closer. This felt pretty damn real for a dream. I wish they would take me off these fucking pills.

"You're not even gonna speak I want through hell to see ya blondie."

I smiled.

"Hi Axel." I said sitting on the floor.

He raised an eyebrow inquisitively as he did the same.

"Why the floor?"

"Why not." I answered pushing my hair back.

He laughed, "You always were such a smart ass."

"So are you gonna tell me what _hell _you went through to see me?"

If it was a dream I might as well go along with it.

He averted his eyes as a slight smirk spread over his face.

"I'm blackmailing those two." He said tilting his head in the direction of the attendees.

"Typical. So how'd you know I was in here."

"Staff talks too loud. Apparently it was quite the scene. Sorry I missed it."

I rolled my eyes, "Yup. It was a blood bath."

He smiled and it showed in those eyes, he leaned forward placing his hand on my mine. And how I prayed to every deity this was real.

"I really did miss you Roxy."

And then my logic kicked back in.

"Ax you don't even know me." I said pulling my hand back and I saw they tiniest bit of pain on his face.

"True. So tell me. Who is Roxas?" he said with a smile.

"Roxas is..." I looked above me, "nobody important." I finished bringing my eyes back down to meet his.

"Well that's your opinion." he said inching closer.

"I'm always right."

"I think you're amazing."

"No you don't."

"See. You're not always right."

Damn. He's good.

"You knew I was gonna say that."

"Maybe."

We sat in a comfortable silence staring at each other.

"I get to leave in 2 more days. Well back to general population at least. What about you?"

I shrugged, "No fucking clue."

We talked for what felt like forever about what seemed like absolutely nothing. Finally he broke our nonsense conversation by saying.

"I wonder will they still leave us in the same room."

I hadn't even thought of that.

"Probabilmente credono che io sia un cattivo esempio..." he mumbled.

"Care to translate."

"Hanno probalimente ragione."

"...Or don't."

"Sorry Rox... I rant in Italian."

"I've noticed."

We fell into a another silence.

"Look we're gonna have to go soon."

I pushed my hair back out of my face, my bangs had grown until they covered my eyes.

"I know."

"You know Roxas, just cause I don't know you doesn't mean I don't think you're amazing."

"... Well you shouldn't."

I lifted my eyes to find Axel closer than before.

"I don't like being told what to do."

"Fine... I won't say anything. Can't stop me from thinking it though."

"Unless you were thinking about something else."

I scoffed, "Like what."

"My lips on yours." He said leaning forward to kiss me.

He had given me plenty of time to move if I had chose to do so, but I didn't.

This was by far the stupidest thing I had ever done in my fucking life. Like seriously? Mental institute romance?

My point exactly.

But I didn't have these rational thoughts until he pulled his mouth from mine leaving me half lidded and gasping like a fish out of water.

He stood up and reached his hand down to mine, linking my hand into his I was elevated off the floor.

"I think we gotta go." he said

"Yeah." I answered

He bent down and kissed me on the forehead. "Mi mancherai."

I laughed, "I wished you would speak English."

"I already told you." He said baking away, "Your confused face is sexy."

I smirked as the two attendees re-appeared grabbing him by the arms.

"Were even right?" mumbled the man.

"Maybe." said Axel looking back at me with a wink.

Jackie let go of Axel and made her way over to me to escort me to the room silently.

"Well I don't know what he has on you but thanks for the visit."

She narrowed her eyes at me and slammed the door shut behind her. I leaned my head forward resting it on the wall and then the realization sat in.

Oh my god. I just kissed Axel.

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**A/N: yeahh so I kindaish liked this chapter. idk. Whatever...so the poll on my story for this story is currently a tie between 2 things so I need more votes so I can pick and do the next chapter while I still have time. Also today is my one year anniversary on this site. *cheers* One year and hopefully more to come 3**

**Translations:**

**Probabilmente credono che io sia un cattivo esempio- They probably think I'm a bad influence on you**

**Hanno probalimente ragione- They're probably right**

**Mi mancherai.-I'm gonna miss you**

**Review...maybe? :)**


	9. Interlude

**Oh wow...it has been FOREVER...like literally jeez. Sorry about that but Im back writing and Im almost done actually so yay! Umm this is just an interlude for a P.O.V switch whatever**

**Disclaimer- Go talk to Disney and Square Enix**

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Interlude

The concept of time was lost in this room. White walls without clocks. Sound proof doors that blocked that silence the passing people. Meals that seemed to appear at random times. Sleeping all day. If I wasn't crazy before I was now. Sometimes I wasn't sure when I was sleeping and when I was awake. When I was dreaming or watching. I has dream about the walls and woke up to them. So discerning between the two was no easy task. What I was sure had been about a week, but I could be wrong was today. About a week since I had seen Axel. That much was real. Or at least I kept telling myself it had to be. The lights were hurting my eyes. Resting my head on my bed with me feet propped up on the wall.

This had to be hell.

There were days when I couldn't remember where I was or why I was here.

But the one thing I always seemed to remember was Axel. And I don't know why, because if you knew me. Well if you knew me you would say I deserve to be in hell and deserve no sympathy, compassion or...whatever Axel is trying to give me. And form of kindness is wasted on a person like me.

But thats what you would say if you _really_ knew me.

I turned over placing my face into the padded mattress praying for a pillow to smother myself with. This was torture. I would rather they just kill me than dragging me along like a half battered mouse waiting for the cat's last strike. Fading in and out of sleep I stared off to the side when I heard the door creak open. But I ignored it as always because I tended to have very vivid dreams.

"Roxas."

I groaned and closed my eyes.

"Roxas...get up."

I felt my eyes rolling backwards when I tried to open them.

Fuck...thats not healthy.

"Roxas!"

The voice was getting fainter and fainter. I tried to sit up, but it wasn't working.

I felt cold skin on mine as my body shook violently.

"Roxas."

And thats the last thing I remember.

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**A/N: Yeah... so theres that ...yeah. Next chapter! **


	10. Chapter 9

**Okay a legit chapter woooo are you excited...nah you probably hate me. Whatever hope you're still reading. Okay whatever. Read and Review**

**Disclaimer- Talk to Disney and Square Enix**

**Caution- Not Beta'd**

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Chapter 9

(Namine's P.O.V.)

"Namine. Take the pills."

I shook my head. "Why should I?"

The nurse looked down on me "This is not up for discussion."

I shifted me weight to one side placing my hand on my hip "Look here bi-"

My words were cut short by a group of attendees running in my direction.

"Grab him now!"

I looked around in panic trying to find out what was happening, scanning the faces of the other residents.

The wind was knocked out of my throat as my head flew back, my blond hair blinding me.

"I'm gonna need to borrow you for a minute beautiful." said a deep voice into my ear, their breath brushing back my hair.

He spun his body to get a better hold on me, swinging out his feet knocking over the medicine cart pills spilled everywhere the cart slammed into the chest of the nurse behind it knocking her to the floor.

I watched as her body fell limp like a ragdoll and slid across the floor.

My mouth dropped open letting out a blood curdling scream as my feet lifted up off the ground and drifted backwards, my head still tilted backwards looking up at the white ceiling above and the jet black hair of my attacker. We ended up down the hall where I promptly flung into a room on my ass and heard the loud slam of the door behind me as the man slid in quickly. I looked up to see him staring down at me with glowing gold eyes and and a arrogant smirk.

"Hello." he said smoothly his voice deep and sensual

I grabbed hold of my chest trying to regulate my heart rate and breathing "What the fuck is your problem?"

"Well you're clearly not very good with introductions. I am Vanitas"

"I dont give a flying fuck who you are, what are you doing?" I yelled swooping the clumps of blond hair out of my eyes.

He looked down and laughed under his breath "Avoiding a needle, so I needed...collateral"

"You mean a hostage...so you mean me."

"Not a hostage...collateral" he said striding over to me slowly.

I skidded backwards trying to evade him.

"No need for concern" he said lowering his face to mine. "I wouldn't dare hurt some as...beautiful, as yourself." he said, his finger gliding from my neck up my jawline.

"Get your hands off me" I said through clenched teeth, he was gorgeous there was no denying that but he had dragged me down the hall by my neck, and sent a nurse flying.

"Oh, temper temper" he replied raising to his feet. "You're not gonna tell my your name? Will I just have to keep referring to you as beautiful?"

I rolled my eyes "You're quite the charmer if only-"

I was once again interrupted by banging at the door "Open this door right now!"

He inched towards me with a demonic look in those glowing eyes.

"What are you doing!" I yelled my voice jumping the octave.

He smirked and the banging on the door got progressively louder, clasping down on my wrist he grabbed tightly and I whimpered.

"Vanitas!" they yelled.

I caught the look of satisfaction on his face, now I saw what he was doing.

He wanted them to think he was hurting me.

"Look" I said in a whisper "If you want me to help you...get your fucking hands off me"

He raised an eyebrow and released me "Fine...how are you gonna help?"

"Its actually pretty simple, you ask to be escorted to your room...you take me with you."

"But darling we've only just met."

I shot him a death glare and he just chuckled lowly "Sorry...continue"

"They wont touch you as long as you're a threat to another patient, when you get in the room let me go"

"Are you sure this is going to work"

I nodded my answer.

"Fine."

He walked over to the door.

"Hey look here assholes I want to go to my room." he said roughly

I raised an eyebrow, his voice was a serious turn on.

"Let Namine out."

He turned back to look at me with triumph written on his face "So its _Namine _you want..." he said my name just gliding off his tongue.

So. Sexy.

I rolled my eyes.

"No can do...you get her when I get my room."

Silence on the other side. Then faint murmuring.

"Fine, your way Vanitas"

He looked back at me and I shook my head no, something was up.

"Now what?" he mouthed. I motioned for him to come over with my finger.

He leaned down and I finally got a good look at those eyes. A person could get lost in them.

"You tell them to clear the door way and stand by your room, keep me close and we walk out."

He nodded rising and heading back towards the door.

"Look here...I want you all to clear from this door. Stand by the room I'm going to and nobody gets near me and Namine."

I melted a little every time he said my name.

Silence. Murmuring.

"Fine."

Gold met blue and I nodded reassuring him we were okay. He motioned for me to come over, he wrapped his arm around my neck as he slowly opened the door.

The attendees were standing at a door near the end of the hall staring at us coldly.

He shoved my forward breathing on my neck, his hair brushing against mine. He smelled amazing.

"Namine!" I was snapped from my reverie by Marluxia's voice calling me. He sounded strained and worried.

Right. Marluxia. My boyfriend.

My eyes rose up to meet his but instead captured Vanitas's.

Gold met blue once again.

And my heart literally skipped a beat, he tore away from my gaze as we halted in front of the room.

The attendees stared us down.

His hand detached itself from my neck and coyly slid down my back ad he inched away from me and into the room. He slammed the door behind him leaving the staff speechless and me with the tingling trail of his fingers down my back.

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**A/N: I love Vanitas don't you? He's great and BBS is amazing whatever another chapter either today or tomorrow for sure cause Im typing now :)**


	11. Chapter 10

**Sooo its short...but its cause its not that important I important for background stuff and only midly important for the Akuroku stuff in later chapters.**

**Disclaimer:Talk to Disney and Square Enix. These people arent mine.**

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Chapter 10

A thin layer of cold sweat lingered on my skin as I sank onto the couch next to Marluxia.

"Why didn't you do anything!" I yelled

"I-I...what was I supposed to do." he said sadly

I scoffed "You're so pathetic, he could have killed me"

He adverted his eyes "I know and I was terrified."

"_You?_ You were terrified? I was damn near choked to death."

"I know that Nam...I know."

I rolled my eyes "Useless." I mumbled.

We sat in an uncomfortable silence. I honestly had no idea why I snapped at him like that. What was wrong with me today.

Nothing more happened that day until dinner time. Actually that's when everything happened.

I sat like normally next to Demyx and Marluxia after picking up my tray. Me and Marluxia still weren't exactly speaking and Demyx was pumped up full of morphine. So needles to say, it was a quiet meal.

Until the faint whispering that appeared throughout the room, I spun around to see what all the commotion was about.

Axel.

My eyes widened, no fucking way. The insane redhead, its as if he were back from the dead.

"Ax!" yelled Yuffie jumping to her feet. Axel smirked those emerald eyes flitting playfully.

"Hey."

A lot of people got up to welcome the redhead. He had made quite a few friends in such a short period of time. He sat at the table with us.

"Hey Namine." he said coolly

"So...if you're back is this good news for Roxas?" I questioned

His eyes lowered "Not sure..." I could see his mind drift else where.

"Hmm" I answered taping the edge of plate with the plastic fork.

I could tell he was unsatisfied with that answer but then again I was unsatisfied with his.

Eventually the lull dissipated into reasonable silence and diner resumed as normally.

For about 5 minutes.

Until crazy ass Vanitas showed up out of nowhere walking with his hands extended to keep the attendees and nurses at bay. I rolled my eyes, god you would think he was some type of celebrity.

"Don't worry, I come in peace." he said smugly

I saw staff roll their eyes and cross their arms. He really was arrogant.

"I promise no problems this time." he said stopping right in front of me

"Isn't that right...Namine."

His eyes staring right into mine

"How the hell would I know...wasn't my day to watch you." I answered sharply

"Oh...always so hostile." he said leaning close. I mean really close. Like too close...like his breath on my lips close.

"I wouldn't be so hostile if you didn't piss me off"

He chuckled. "Maybe this, will change your mind."

Okay, look it was my own fault. I should have seen it coming, but I didn't and so before I knew it his lips were on mine.

Like I said. Crazy ass Vanitas,

"What the fuck?" said a voice. Marluxia's voice. My schizo boyfriend.

Fucked.

"Whoa" said the raven haired man backing up. "Didn't know she was claimed property."

"You get the fuck out of here. Right now!" yelled Marluxia was a growl to his voice raising from his seat.

Axel laughed under his breath taking a sip from his cup.

"Oh, the things you miss in solitary." he mumbled

"Wow. You seem upset. Maybe you should sit back down." replied Vanitas with that same patronizing arrogance.

"You son of a bitch!" yelled Marluxia making a beeline for Vanitas

I saw Axel cringe out the side of my eye.

"Whoa!" yelled a nurse locking Marluxia by the arms as Vanitas stood with a look of triumph on his face. I hated and loved that face. Another attendee came over to assist in calming him down.

"So I'm just gonna take a seat...right here." He said patting the chair that formerly belonged to Marluxia

I laughed lightly. "You're fucking crazy you know that?"

"Wouldn't be here if I wasn't." he said, his voice was smooth,laced with arrogance, and quickly drowning out the sound of Marluxia's as they dragged him down the hall.

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**A/N: Yup. There you go. Um...new shit in maybe 2 weeks? Its summer vaca so I feel like 2 weeks Go vote on the poll on my profile. And review **

**~Love~**


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:Talk to Square Enix**

**WOOOO for an update...severely rushed in celebration of my FAVORITE holiday Happy AkuRoku day GUYSSS 3**

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Chapter 11

_Roxas P.O.V_

I woke staring at the ceiling letting out a sigh as I sat looking towards the door. The nurses would be coming with my meds and breakfast soon. My eyes darted over to the analog clock, the short hand pointed at the 8 the long hand placed between the 2 and 3.

8:13

They should be here already, plus I was ready to get up and walk.

Right then the handle of the door clicked to the right creaking open.

"Good morning Roxas." she said cheerfully

I smiled brushing my bangs out of my face "Hey Juliet."

"What do you have for me today?"

"A lot...pancakes, sausages, orange juice, pills and...discharge papers."

At that moment my stomach sank.

"What do you...mean...discharge?"

"Well Roxas, you are high functioning." she said sitting the tray of food on the dresser.

"So?"

"Well...this wing is really only for more severe cases, those with actual mental disorders, but the wing where you were before is mainly for behavioral problems or milder cases...your stay here was only temporary."

My eyes dropped to the floor my mind reeling trying to make sense of all this.

"But I have school here and I take my pills and..." my voice was whining

"Oh I know Roxas..." she said placing her hand on my shoulder

"That's why were sending you back...you're doing so well."

I hung my head low. I had been in this wing for 4 months, everything was so different. Everybody left me alone I didn't have to fake any emotions any sarcastic comments, the had enrolled me back in the schooling programs and put me on anti-depressants.

Now believe me, in the beginning I fought them at every fucking turn but after the first month I stopped. Something about being sedated multiple times in a week, being restrained, crying yourself to sleep and, begging for death makes you try a new approach.

So here I am...I was starting to feel...like..well that's the past. And this present I live in has been fucked for a long time.

I sighed and forced a smile "Alright then."

She smiled back flipping her blonde hair "Alright, Oh...and they have your books and everything

packed so can finish your work back in the other wing."

"...great."

I laid back down as she exited feeling completely hopeless. My mind was swarmed with thoughts of all the things I have left behind when I came over here but one stood out in particular.

Axel.

A few hours later I had just finished picking at my lunch, I hadn't had much of an appetite all that day when the attendees came in.

"Roxas, we got you all packed up. Ready to go?"

I felt the nausea setting in at the thought of going back but nodded anyway. The wings were connected via extended hallways with key-card lock. My personal nurse Juliet walked beside me as the male attendee pushed all my personal belongings. I could feel the anxiety building in my stomach as she unlocked the first door with a swipe walking down the endless corridor

Yeah. Endless. I wish...then we'd never get there.

Upon approaching the second door my nausea got the best of me I cupped my hand to my mouth trying to hold it down, ineffectively of course. I turned my head away from her discarding my lunch on the floor. The two attendees stepped back quickly trying to avoid being hit.

"Oh my god Roxas!"

I stood there bent over at the waist feeling...truthfully relieved.

"Are you okay?" asked the other attendee.

I hate that question.

I nodded and stood there a while longer while the male escaped to go find a custodian.

She leaned back looking back at me "Nerves got to you?"

I stood up brushing back my hair "...shut up."

She leaned back raising an eyebrow. "That's a little harsh don't you think?"

I felt myself just getting angrier and angrier, I didn't want to go back. Four months of doing what they wanted and for what? For what fucking reason?

"Roxas..."

"Shut. Up." I said firmly standing up straight. "You're sending me back, you're not my nurse. Keep the fucking books, keep the fucking pills. I'm done"

Her face went blank and her smile shrunk into a thin line.

"Fine." she said flatly swiping the key card "they'll bring the remainder of your belongings after wards"

And just that fast everything I had worked for was quickly unraveling

I bit the inside of my cheek fighting back my apologetic words.

I entered the wing through the cafeteria, I expected to feel something, anxious, angry, scared..._something _

but honestly I was completely and totally numb. Void of all feeling. And from there things just got worse.

Namine.

In a split I felt blue meet blue and before I knew it, before anything could even process.

I ran.

Everything I had gained, everything I had try to forget. In a single instance came flooding back and so I ran from it, back to my old room slamming the door behind me breathing heavily try not to cry. I didnt even know why I felt so panicked but I did. I wanted to hide and be safe from things I was trying to avoid but then the problem came storming through the door

Axel

"Roxas?" his voice went up showing his surprise and at this moment I was quite literally backed into a corner...the one behind the door why he stood there with complete and utter confusion on his face.

Why was this happening?

I watched as his confusion softened into content. "Roxas..."

I swallowed hard, my breathing returning to normal. "Yeah."

"I ugh..." his emerald eyes dropped I didnt remember him looking _this _ good

"You?"

"...ugh..mi-missed you" he said looking backing up

Seriously, those eyes could kill.

"Oh..." I said brushing bag my shaggy bangs

"Yeah..."

Then we just stood there. Silence. God I wanted to go back. I wanted to be anywhere but here

"Did you miss me?"

Of course he had to ask me that. How simply I could have lied...should have lied...but instead I said

"...Yeah."

More silence

"Oh..."

"Roxas, are we gonna talk or no..."

When did _he _get so direct.

I coughed lightly clearing my throat "Yeah sure..."

The panic started creeping back up as he walked pass me sitting on the bed.

"Are you gonna come over here?" there was an edge of annoyance in his voice

I had lost all my fight and instead of arguing I just walked over sitting on the bed across from him.

"Roxas...I know it seems like...forever ago but at some point me and you had something..."

"Axel-"

"And I just wanna know...what happens now..you're back."

I did not want to have this conversation.

I shook my head

"Bullshit."

I shook my head

"What the hell Roxas you lie, you fight me you kiss me you get transferred you come back-

"Not of my own free will!" I yelled standing "I didn't want to come back to this any of this, the drama the bullshit."

"So then nothing" he said standing "Nothing happens me and you we don't matter"

And now...now I started crying "Thats bullshit! We'll never be nothing cause we play a fucked up game Axel but you don't want me..."

His face smoothed over "Why would you say that?" he said calmly

"Because" I yelled hating the sound of my own whiny weak voice.

Amazing how quickly we change.

"Cause...Im fucked up kay Axel? You know what...move." with that I pushed pass him beelining for the door...or at least I tried before he grabbed my wrist. His hand was burning against my skin. He felt like he as on fire.

"Sit."

When a voice like that tells you to sit, if you don't listen your body will. I felt myself get weak.

When the fuck did I become this person?

I sat down on the floor staring up at him and watched as he slowly sat down in front of me.

"Let me tell you something Roxas...you don't know what fucked up is. Fucked up is running away from home, running away from parents you can't stand...and running to the Marines. I was so sure of myself I knew that I was tall enough, strong enough, smart enough I could join the marines no problem. And I was right about that...the getting in for me was easy I passed the physical entrance exams at the highest in my group."

He stopped, a smile spread across his face

"Almost the top of my group, the only person better than me was this one little guy. He was a shrimp...

5' 6" maybe 130lbs tops"

I pouted "Thats not a shrimp"

He laughed "Yeah says you.."

"Any way...he was the only competition I had and I hated him...that day but after me and him became best friends and when we got in we were roommates when we had our training we were always together. But we were cocky and full ourselves and so our corpral gave the two of us hell, but it was more than that...he hated us. Why? Damned if I fucking know, but he did. He called me every name in the book but his favorite...bitch."

I looked down as the pieces started coming together

"Stupid bitch, fucking bitch, lazy bitch, faggot bitch..."

He chuckled lightly "The last one especially"

"But we would laugh about it...mock him...it was how we made it through. And then...things changed. He would be out late and how wouldn't talk to me we started arguing...and suddenly I was the only faggot bitch...our corpral left him alone. I couldn't understand it...till one night I stumbled in on..."

He stopped looking at the floor

"Axel?"

He swallowed hard "I walked in to the artillery room and I could hear...I could hear Ventus screaming...like somebody was killing him"

He ground his teeth, tears filling his eyes.

"And when they saw me our corpral pushed him down and Ventus looked like he wanted to die."

He took a deep breath tears falling down his cheeks "If I had known I wanted to do something...say something...anything. Those screams...Roxas they haunt me. And he looked...so much like you."

His voice dropping to almost a whisper

"And that day you cried...I saw him all over again. I heard his cries all over..that Roxas...that is fucked up."

And so here we were again. Face to face.

"So if that doesn't send you running..."

He was giving me every opportunity to move...to leave anything. But I didn't. And as soon as his lips touched mine everything that happened melted away.

Everything was Axel. And nothing hurt.

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**A/N: Lotsssss of loose ends that Im gonna fix next chapter PROMISE**

**Hope you liked it at least a little**


	13. Chapter 12

Oh look I exist...as does this story. WHO KNEW? I blame my junior year -_- who knew there was this much shit to do? Well you live and you learn...

Disclaimer- These be Disney and Square Enix bitches :(

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Chapter 12

I woke up the next morning struggling to pry my eyes open I reached up wiping them slowly rolling back my aching shoulders.

What the fuck had happened last night?

I felt like hell and just as I asked myself that question everything started flooding back I spun around quickly to find Axel laying on the bed next to me, those emerald eyes directed up to the ceiling

"Good morning" he said turning to face me

I stared at him my mind searching for memories. What the hell happened?

He kept staring at me expectantly it took what felt like years before I made the connection

"Morning" I mumbled back

He nodded letting his head drop back on the pillow.

Suddenly it really came back and my chest started hurting. Me and Axel had stayed up almost all night talking about his past. His dysfunctional family, drunk of a father and hot headed corporal with pedophile tendencies and the best friend he never saw again. The guy had a fucked up history and whats worse is he had about half a dozen tattoos to remind him of each fucked up part. Lots of times when we were talking he would stop and mumble things to himself in Italian. I picked up a decent amount of curse words. He also referred to his father 'asshole' which was stronzo in Italian. Of all the things that helped break Axel, all the things that slowly drove him to the edge was that Ventus kid. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the entire story myself. What I do know is they were friends and when that douche bag did _that _to him Axel felt like it was is fault...he should have protected him or something. Can you imagine that kind of guilt looming over you? But you know that the saddest part is? As fucked up as his life is...mine is far worse...and I haven't told him a single damn thing.

"So what exactly are you thinking about?" he said

"...A lot of shit"

"Like?"

I scoffed "Nothing you need in your head"

He laughed nodding his head "You're probably right, so how is all my shit doing in yours?"

I shrugged "Still being sorted...think there's some room in the back"

We sat in a silence for a moment, I guess deciding whether that was a joke or a cryptic metaphor before we just stated laughing

I smiled looking over at him, he looked at me his eyes looking a little brighter. I think at that moment we both realized just how fucked up we were but we also realized now we got to be fucked up together.

The oh so familiar knock on the door let me know it was time for a breakfast that I probably wasn't going to eat.

The attendee slipped in still knocking "Breakfast guys"

I watched as Axel got up brushing back his bright red hair and the reality began setting in. Just how...for lack of a better word strange our...relationship? Can we call it a relationship? Anyway, the reality of how strange our whatever-you-call-it was. I mean, few times we've been together he's yelled at me, given me a nickname, spoken a foreign language, broke my ankle, had a breakdown...two actually, told me his entire life story and kissed me.

He looked back at me quizzically, I guess wondering why I was still sitting on the bed.

"Roxy?"I looked up, there's that name "Coming?" "Yeah, right now."

The entire situation was...unstable at best. You can't blame me for feeling a bit uneasy about what could happen next. It seemed from one day to the next my life had no continuity, things just happened at random. That kind of uncertainty was scary as hell. I got up walking out behind him and then he did reached back lightly touching my hand before he walked out, I slowed a bit letting my thoughts catch up with me. I started realizing so much more, more than I wanted to realize, like how I broke down yesterday

"_That's bullshit! We can't be nothing, we can't let it go cause we play a fucked up game Axel but you don't want me..."_

I remembered the tears running down my face. I looked down at my hand where his had just been a second ago, the feeling still lingered, and then I looked back up at his thin figure walking away.

What the hell was happening?

I walked through the line grabbing cereal, would I eat it? Probably not.

I slowly sat down at the table across from Namine, out of habit I didn't even think.

"Well well well." she said smiling devilishly "If it isn't my partner in crime."

I looked up at her smiling faintly "In the flesh"

I tried to hold a normal conversation but I was slowly getting lost in my own thoughts. That first night he was here...that conniving attitude. There were so many parts to Axel...and there was no way of determining which one you would get. But as scary as that was I still just kept hearing

"_So if that doesn't send you running..."_

Over and over, his calming voice in my ear giving me the opportunity to get out of this cycle of unpredictable disaster but instead I sat back and let him kiss me. I couldn't bring myself to regret it.

So now I was in this. And who knows for how long. I was snapped from my thoughts when I heard my name.

"...and Roxas wont object"I looked up "What am I not objecting to?" "Sex with Axel"

I blinked slowly staring at her "Clearly...I missed something"

"You didn't actually...out of the clear blue sky she started talking about sex which is normal for Nam." said a man with dark hair and a deep voice.

I stared on in confusion "...And you are?"

He smirked

"Vanitas."

I looked over at Namine raising an eyebrow, she just smiled slightly. I looked over back at him. He definitely seemed more her type but than where was Marluxia? I didn't dare ask.

I nodded shoving a mouthful of cereal in my mouth "Cool, I'm Roxas."

Namine cringed as I talked with food in my mouth "Roxas that is so gross."

I shrugged "What can I say, I have no manners" I replied shoving more cereal in my mouth, honestly I was just trying to find a way to distract myself from the current situation which made me incredibly uncomfortable. I mean there's Namine being Namine, this new guy who clearly sends Namine wild which means he's a raving lunatic, there's Axel who I guess technically is now _my _raving lunatic and then there's me. What the fuck can even be said about me? The entire scenario was...well crazy.

Ironic.

Everybody kept talking and I kept drifting in and out, sometimes laughing when it was appropriate, other times missing the joke completely as I built up scenario after scenario in my head. Me playing out in my head how I would tell Axel about me, about what I'd seen and done. Imagining him storming out, imaging me crying, imagining that bitch of a therapist laughing at my pain. I sighed feeling mentally drained, I was snapped from my thoughts as Axel wrapped his arm around me.

"Are you okay?"

I scoffed "I haven't been okay for years Axel."

He shrugged agreeing with the statement "Okay for you?"

"By my standards, yeah I'm okay."

He stood picking up our food tossing it in the trash. "Are you gonna sit out here for a while."

"Um...nah I'm gonna go back to the room." I said looking at my feet.

He nodded "Figured. Okay, I'll be out here if you want me." he said pointing behind him the couch.

Nodding I walked to the room and laid on the bed,. It was weird for me, everything was just weird because I had no clue what I was doing. I guess I was dating Axel, I suppose he's my boyfriend, I think me and Namine are best friends again and...I don't even know. I fell on the bed closing my eyes. Nothing was fact, nothing was stable, everything was a game of chance..again. I hated not knowing what was going, I hated not having control over the situation it made me weaker than I already was. I sighed and turned over as my mind kept going and going with more and more questions, more possible outcomes and creating more fears. Eventually even my brain got tired and I fell asleep.

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**A/N: Well..theres that...pleased? angry? questions comments or complaints you know where to send em**


	14. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: Don't sue, cause Im broke

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Chapter 13

When I woke up it was dark outside, I wasn't sure how many hours I had been sleep. I laid there for a few minutes letting my mind catch up to my body and officially wake up. As my mind cleared I became more aware of my situation, and aware of the fact that Axel was laying in bed next to me. I calmed myself forcing myself not to panic and freak him out, I mean this was normal right? If we we are dating this is what people who date do. Eventually it just got to weird and I sat up propping myself up against the wall staring at him.

He looked just as gorgeous sleep.

I started feeling a bit strange just sitting against the wall staring at him, it made me feel like a stalker and other things.

I nudged him lightly with my foot trying to wake him up. His breathing changed slightly but he stayed sleep. I sighed nudging him again. "Axel...Axel" I called continually pushing him. His eyes shot open and he looked angry.

He looked really, really angry.

My breath caught in my throat and my skin turned cold as he stared me down with those emerald eyes.

Slowly he closed his eyes breathing out slowly before re-opening them and looking at me again with a much more neutral look.

"Its never a good idea to wake me about suddenly" he mumbled.

I breathed a sigh of relief and nodded "I'll remember that."

He stretched turning on his back "When did you wake up?" he asked yawning

"Like 5 minutes ago. When did you go to sleep?"

He shrugged "Like an hour ago."

"How long have I been sleep."

"7 or 8 hours."

"Really?"

"Mhm, so I decided to come join you." he replied with a smile. Internally I melted as the smile spread across his face. I was so scared I was gonna fuck this up, even though me and Axel had both agreed we were screwed up children at least I knew his issues, he had no clue what kind of person I was.

"How sweet of you." I said moving closer to him.

He laughed lightly wrapping his arms around me. "Namine said to come back out whenever you woke up."

"Why?"

"Most likely because she misses her partner in crime."

I laughed "This is true."

Axel sat up brushing back his hair which I to this day find unbelievably red. He stood up holding his hands down to me. Looking at us you wouldn't think we were imprisoned lunatics who had just established this some what committed relationship roughly 48 hours ago. From the outside we looked normal. And at that moment I felt both happy and deceitful. Because of Axel I felt some what normal, even if it was just for a second I felt normal which is more than I can say about all of the years before this and I just felt that Axel deserved to know what he was getting himself into. I grabbed his hands as he pulled me off the bed and walked over to the door. I was quickly formulating my words trying piece together how I would tell him all of this.

"You don't really know who I am Axel..." I thought. I didn't like the way that sounded "I've been holding back..." I didn't like that either. "I think its only fair you know what you've gotten into..." I sighed, there was no good way to say this. We walked into the living area where I found Namine

sitting next to Vanitas with her head on his shoulder. It was cute and awkward.

"Oh look who woke up." said Vanitas leaning back to look up.

I shrugged before sitting on the other couch across from them and Axel sat beside me crossing his legs.

"Rox-sass" said Namine turning and waving obnoxiously.

I rolled my eyes "Wow you're a loser."

She sucked her teeth "Wow you're a bitch."

I laughed lightly flipping her off "Yeah and that's for you."

"Ohh sorry, didn't I tell you? That's what he's for." she replied pointing to Vanitas. "Ya snooze, ya loose."

I stuck my tongue out making a pretend gagging noise. "Disgusting, that's gross."

We both laughed as I leaned back moving closer to Axel and Namine situated herself in Vanitas's lap.

Contentment like this was...unheard of.

We sat like that watching T.v and making the occasional comment to each other and sharing laughs for about 1 ½ hrs and I decided I really liked Vanitas. He was funny, smart, sarcastic, and drop dead gorgeous. Him and Namine worked well. But I've learned happiness and contentment don't last long. Which is why I shouldn't have been so shocked when the voice appeared behind us.

"So this is what happens when you leave. You get replaced."

We all spun around rapidly to see the source of speaking to find Marluxia.

It was like he had risen from the dead, I mean time conception was lost here anyway but honestly it had been _forever_ since I had seen him.

"Well look who it is, you're looking well." said Vanitas coyly

I swear on everything Marluxia's eye twitched.

"Go to hell Vanitas."

Vanitas brushed back his black hair letting out a sigh "Oh, temper."

Marluxia walked closer to us and Axel very quickly sat up moving me next to him, he looked defensive.

"Shut up." he growled moving closer. Vanitas reposistioned himself the same way Axel had taking Namine off his lap.

"I'm not liking your tone." he said his voice dropping nearly an octave.

Scary shit.

"I'm not like you. Period." said Marluxia inching ever closer.

This was not going to end well.

Namine back herself up into the corner of the couch clearly foreseeing the same doom I did. "Look Marluxia, we weren't good when we were together, and then you left and..." she looked away letting out a sigh. Her eyes darted back up "It was just better this way!" she yelled with much more force in her voice.

"Better?" he asked making his way towards Namine but Vanitas stood in his way.

Seriously, where is the fucking staff. Honestly? We run around with _no _supervision in this place.

"Look." said Vanitas with a shrug "The thing is I did you what you failed to do. You messed up and I stepped in. No need for the hostility."

Marluxia's eyes clouded with anger as he lunged at Vanitas circling his hands on his neck, Vanitas took a sweep blow to Marluxia's stomach with his knee, I could hear the wind being knocked out of him as he gasped for air, but he continued shaking Vanitas by his neck. Namine let out a loud scream as Marluxia started clawing at Vanitas's face, Axel jumped off the couch and ran around to the other side grabbing Vanitas by the shoulders sliding him from underneath Marluxia's grip. The lavender-haired man stood back realizing what was happening.

"This doesn't involve you."

"Get a fucking grip!" yelled Axel Marluxia moved accroos the room in front of the couch I sat on so I jumped over the back and moved to the other side of the room.

"Mind your own damn business!" he hollered running directly at Axel who held a bloodied Vanitas in his arms.

As Marluxia approached the two of them Vanitas used Axel as a support and leaned back kicking Marluxia straight in his stomach. Marluxia doubled over in pain, we all stood there in fear of what would happen next. The pain must have resided as he suddenly shot back up letting out a throaty yell kicking the table in its leg sending it sliding across the room to where I was standing hitting me in the legs. I yelped and fell to the ground as the wood made sharp contact with my leg sending pain all the way into my bone. Axel quickly dropped Vanitas who scrambled out of the way over to Namine leaving Axel to make his way to me. Marluxia turned his attention back to Axel who he now felt was more of a threat and moved forward to him but as moved back quickly and Marluxia's hand grazed the top of my head sending me backwards. My head abruptly hit the white bricked wall causing hurt throughout my entire body. Axel's warm hands gripped my face yelling something inaudible as more voices swarmed around us.

That was before everything went black.

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**A/N: Honestly I dont think its healthy for one person to black out this much. Agree? Disagree? Hate me, Love me. **


	15. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: 14 chapters in...do you even give a fuck anymore? Theyre not mine...

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Chapter 14

This waking up in strange places with no full recollection of how I got there was getting old.

"You make me nervous." said a voice beside me.

I turned to find Axel's green eyes looking at me. I sighed groaning "I worry myself."

I watched as he unscrewed the top off a water bottle taking a few sips. "I got you out of there before some attendees decided they wanted to show up."

I scoffed "Why is that?"

"Because every time an attendee gets a hold of one of us we disappear for extended periods of time."

I yawned "Good point."

"How does your head feel?"

I shrugged "Okay far as I can tell."

"Leg?"

"Its been worse." I said looking at him with a raised eyebrow

He scoffed "Yeah yeah, I know."

"Don't feel bad."

"I'm gonna get us out of here."

Closing my eyes I sighed "Okay Axel..."

He spun around quickly "I'm serious. I can't deal with this."

"Axel even if you by some act of god managed to get out of here Im the last person you would want to take with you."

"Actually the last person would be Marluxia, you're a lot higher on the list." he said laughing

I rolled my eyes laughing lightly before stopping and looking down "Seriously though Axel..."

He sighed "What Roxas, what about you could be so horrible." he stood up running his hands through his hair. "I mean honestly!" he yelled "What the fuck could be so wrong with you Roxas!"

I sat up "How about that my name isnt even Roxas!" I yelled.

He turned to me looking puzzled. "What do you m-"

"Or how about my hair isn't blond or why the hell I'm here. You don't know me Axel!"

His face went blank as he sat down in the chair beside me. "Fine...explain."

I felt myself shaking as I realized ultimately what was happening. I scratched my head trying to find out how to begin, I didn't want to tell him like this. I looked down at me feet trying to find my voice.

"I was sent here by my parents and the court system after they assessed me as a habitual liar, which totally wasnt my fault seeing as I was breed into it not born into it." I stopped clearing my throat.

"My dad...um, back when I was a kid we lived in the middle of nowhere. Like seriously our closest neighbor was like five miles away and my dad...I can't think of a better phrase for sadistic murderer."

I stopped to see the reaction on his face but he didn't show any sign of emotion.

"We lived out really far...like I said and we had a shed type thing more like a barn I guess and I never went out there cause I was too little and my mom always told me not to but when I turned 9, I guess I got curious, and stumbled into something...a lot of somethings I wasn't supposed to see. There was blood everywhere."

I leaned back closing my eyes. "Some things can't be unseen. I'll give you the abbreviated version of the next two years which consisted of me in a pickup truck taking long drives out to the park watching innocent people being dragged back to my shed. Cleaning off bloodied tools and lying to my mother consistently and well. That's how I perfected my lying, you've got to be really good to look somebody in the eye and without a single shred of emotion and tell them the blood on your pants came from when you scarped your knee, not a woman grasping at her last chance of life."

I opened my eyes staring up at the ceiling pleasantly surprised by how calm I was.

"So when I finally got the balls to tell somebody everything went wrong, when I managed to expertly explain everything in such detail without a hitch they were concerned and with my parents on the sidelines yelling 'hes a demon' 'he wants to destroy us' it didn't take much for me to end up here."

I shrugged running my hand through my hair.

"My hair is brown but I lightened it originally with peroxide and then I got my hands on some real dye."

Axel just stared at me with his face completely void of feeling.

"Added an X to my name, thought that would be cool, it used to be Sora...decided to just settle in here. I mean why fight it you know? So if that-"

Axel held up his hand and stood shaking his head. Brushing back his hair I watched silently as he walked to the door without looking back and closed it behind him.

Like I said. Contentment doesn't last long.

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**A/N: Anger, disappointment, confusion. You're currently suffering from all these things aren't you...I know...its okay**


	16. Chapter 15

******Hello toys and squirrels sorry for being an awful author who hasnt updated in 6 months. I'm really sorry BUT we are about 2 chapters away from the close of this adventure. Thank you for holding on with me. Currently writing 16(which should be the finale but these stories have a mind of their own) and the Epilogue. Thank you all SO much this is too date my most popular story.**

Disclaimer:...I don't wanna talk about it...its hurts me

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Chapter 15

I hadn't moved since Axel walked out, I was just laying there waiting and thinking. The way I saw it, he'd have to come back eventually I mean after all the room was where he slept. So I just waited, it wasn't like there was anything I was doing. I couldn't sleep, I felt like hell and a few times I felt myself on the verge on tears. Hours passed, maybe three more like four. I wondered would it have just been easier to make up bullshit story about my life. He had probably heard that story and went and threw up, I probably would have thrown up. To know that a human being that disgusting was right in front him.. He probably envisioned me all covered in blood, he thought I was some kind of sadistic disgusting person. And if it were anybody else I would not have cared but it was Axel.

Axel mattered.

As soon as that thought registered in my brain I felt myself getting nauseous and light headed. I jumped up with my feet hitting the cold tile, I clutched my sides and ran for the trashcan right in front of the door before doubling over and waiting for the inevitable. I felt the walls of my mouth drip with spit as my stomach contracted over and over sending everything up so forceful that tears came to my eyes. The very thought that I had destroyed the only functioning relationship I had that mattered physically made me sick. The idea that he was conjuring all type of stories in his head made me sick, the fact that somebody actually knew who I was and what I was made me fucking sick. I stood over the trashcan for a little while longer letting the remnants finish falling from my mouth and the spinning in my head to slow to a stop.

I stood back up slowly sighing. It had been hours where the hell was he? Why wasn't he back, even if he didn't want to see me he had to come back to this room. He slept in here. I don't get it. Panic began to set in as I thought about the only other place he could be, but him getting himself sent to solitary just to avoid me seemed a little extreme. That couldn't happen. I couldn't imagine him going through all this just to avoid me. I felt my stomach tensing up again.

I bent back over the trash can feeling that same feeling just before I threw up again. With there being almost nothing in my stomach it was mainly just liquid and painful retching. It finally stopped and I stood up again. I felt like hell. Sighing I slowly reached for the doorknob and slowly walked down the hall to the bathroom. I held my head under the faucet letting the mildly cool water run into my mouth to rinse it out.

What the fuck was happening to me?

I gulped in more water and spit it back into the sink before standing up to look in the mirror. I sighed and brushed back my hair which was lacking its normal spike and looked a little limp. I bent back down splashing water on my face. Sighing one more time I wiped my face dry with the rough paper towels from the dispenser and headed back down the hall towards my room when I stopped, and just shook my head. The door was open and I was positive that meant Axel was in there. Suddenly I wished he hadn't come back, I didn't see this going anywhere good. I walked into the room and of course in the darkness there was Axel and his glowing eyes and hair.

He looked up at me but didn't say anything. I scratched the back of my head and coughed lightly and he just kept staring with this relentless glare. I coughed lightly feeling overwhelmingly uncomfortable. I leaned against the wall not wanting to go any further into the room.

He tilted his head but didn't say anything, so I guess he wasn't going to. I coughed again more or less testing my throat. He wasn't going to speak first he was too damn stubborn. But why, hadn't I done enough talking for years, I never wanted to open my fucking mouth again. I opened my mouth to speak but instead just rolled my shoulder back and sighed. Letting out another shaky breath I looked up and my eyes met his, his face was blank and impatient.

I put my head down running my fingers through my hair.

"Axel-"

"You don't actually have to talk." he said "I just wanted to see how long it would take."

I looked up at him both angry and relieved then he flashed this dumb ass smile and I was just happy.

"We shouldn't talk, were not cut out for talking. Not seriously at least. I say we stick to sarcasm and sex."

I raised an eyebrow.

"We'll get to the second later."

I was glad it was dark because I was sure my face was heating up.

"So were good?" I questioned my voice still sounding uncertain and little weak.

"Yeah Roxy yeah...its just." He shook his head "Yeah were good."

I sighed again looking up at him "So now what?"

He held out his arms and motioned for me to come over, slowly I walked to him climbing on the bed into his lap with my head on his chest.

My question wouldn't be answered until the next morning.

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**A/N: Yeah yup more loose ends and cliff hangers. I feel like you guys are sharpening your knives planning my death. Anyway. Almost done 16. Don't kill me! **


	17. Chapter 16

**Hello once again. Told you I was going to use these off days to wrap it up so here we are just as promised. The final chapter of "Pass The Brink of Insanity" you guys are amazing. Thanks so much**

**Disclaimer: LOL you're ignoring this cause you want to read the last chapter.**

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Chapter 16

I woke up the next morning to Axel pacing so I quietly sat as he mumbled. In our time together I had begun building a compilation of what not to do to upset Axel. Bothering him while he was pacing was a very big one. Eventually he looked over at me.

"Roxas." He said sounding unsure of himself.

"Yeah."

He shook his head, running his hand through the unruly mane.

"Sorry."

"No problem. So you were thinking?" I asked crossing my legs.

He nodded.

"About?"

"You."

Any normal relationship this would be cute but I was worried my stomach started twisting and I felt my pulse begin to race.

"What were you thinking about?" I asked my throat feeling suddenly dry.

"Are you scared of blood now?"

My skin went cold, I didn't want to do this.

He sighed. "Roxas I just need to know."

"I thought we were letting this go."

"Believe me Roxas I want nothing more than to forget our pasts but me and you." He said gesturing between us. "We are…were fucking mine fields and I have to know where not to step. Because we work, somehow even with our issues and dysfunctions we work and I wont throw that away over something that has an easy fix."

"There is no easy fix for my mental instability!" I screeched.

He stopped and took a deep breath, I know better than to yell at him.

And then it hit me.

Fuck.

I sighed "Okay…I'm sorry you're right."

He raised an eyebrow.

"I mean, if we know what we like and we don't like then it could work…I've been learning what sets you off and I guess you deserve the same."

"So?" he asked.

"I am horrified by blood, it makes me sick."

He nodded "Makes sense."

I took a deep breath, this was turning into some cryptic version on 20 questions and I was really against it but I actually liked Axel and for the first time in years I met a person who actually mattered so he was worth it.

"I also hate the smell of hay." I said quietly. There was as slight churning in the pit of my stomach.

He nodded as he made his way over to the bed, I guess the fear and discomfort was evident on my face. He gently placed his hand over mine looking at me with his green eyes that Ive seen filled with anger and terror were now filled with an unknown warm look that made me tingle all over.

"Okay." He said with a nod. "No blood, no hay."

I cleared my throat and nodded again. "So were forgetting our pasts." I mumbled.

"While remembering the tendencies and triggers _of _our pasts"

We both nodded before we started laughing in this self-pitied hysterical laughter until we had tears in our eyes.

"Oh god Roxy were so fucked up."

"We created fucked up." I said still laughing.

I laid my head on his shoulder as the magnitude of everything came crashing down at once, I felt tears coming to my eyes but I refused to cry.

Axel leaned down and kissed my forehead and this rush of comfort just came over me.

But then of course we were interrupted by that oh so faithful knock from the attendee.

"Andarsene" yelled Axel with his full Italian accent.

It was ungodly how sexy it was.

"Breakfast." Said the attendee completely unphased by Axel.

I sighed and got up as we headed into the cafeteria. We found Namine and Vanitas already seated with Demyx and some other people. Our breakfast table wasn't usually so crowded but I didn't complain, I grabbed my usual cereal and sat down with Axel by my side.

Namine looked dead, she had bags under her eyes she just looked a mess.

"Didn't sleep well?" I asked her

She just shook her head. We carried on with odd small talk. The entire day just had an off vibe too it. Too quite too…normal.

The calm before the storm.

At some point Axel just got up without any reason and went back to the room.

"Axel." I called after him in a quiet voice.

But he kept on walking; whatever was wrong I was gonna let him work it out. I returned my attention back to the overly crowded table full of people having conversations I didn't give a fuck about and Namine looking like walking death.

Finally I was done. I trashed my cereal and started back towards the room, in retrospect I realize what was wrong with Namine that day. She had already talked to Axel.

When I go to our room Axel was in their throwing shit around like a frantic mad man. I sighed.

We worked.

"Axel, what are you doing?"

He kept up his frantic pace.

"Packing."

"Why are you packing?" I asked calmly moving closer to him.

"I'm getting out of here." He raced over to me clapping his hands on my shoulders. "Were getting out of here." He smiled brightly and then placed a quick kiss on my lips.

I nodded slightly dazed by the kiss. "How Axel."

"Don't worry yourself over specifics. I've got this under control."

I just sighed and went over to my bed lying down.

"Alright, if you say so."

He stayed in that frantic state for a while longer but eventually I drifted off to sleep. When I woke up I was in Axel's arms. In just for a split second all the hell, the stress, the grief and all the other stupid bullshit was worth it.

I don't know how but we did work…we do work.

I was about to wake him when I remembered last time.

Were mine-fields.

So I just laid there for a while, eventually his body began to move against mine, he let out a long sigh that turned into a yawn as he woke up.

"Roxy." He said with a smile.

"Axel." I said returning the gesture. Just then he sat straight up.

"What time is it?" he yelled. Stretching I peered over his shoulder.

"2pm."

He sank back down looking both relieved and defeated.

"You okay?"

He nodded and kissed me again. I was starting to really enjoy kissing him.

"Wheres all the stuff you packed?" I asked seeing the emptiness of the room, a few things were missing, mainly clothes.

"We need to kill time." He said

I looked at him confused, or don't answer me, that okay too. "…okay, so what do you want to do?"

We spent the next 2 hours playing 20 questions, honestly anybody with any sense could have seen something was up but I was stupid and naïve. To this day I've never fully forgiven him for leaving me out of his plan. But anyway, we played 20 questions and it wasn't even the good sexy kind it was the really boring one you play with your parents in the car. Well not me and my parents and not Axel and his parents but normal people with normal parents

Then it was dinner time, even though nothing important came from that game I was really glad we played. It was fun.

At dinner Namine wasn't there, Vanitas was sitting by himself watching Tv looking like a defeated puppy.

Happiness dulls your senses because I should have seen this all coming, I don't know.

At dinner me and Axel were both just going through the motions he was off, and it was throwing me off then Namine wasn't there and Vanitas was depressed. It was all very strange.

As I was shoving another tasteless forkful of food in my mouth the fire alarms went off the lights were flashing, somebody screamed and after all those years I should've known that voice, I looked over to Axel just as he was grabbing my arm. I looked up to find Vanitas making a break down the hallway, I saw something fly and that was followed by the sound of shattered glass lots of shattered glass.

Chaos.

The table we were sitting at tipped over and attendees were flying everywhere, Axel had a painfully tight grip on my wrist and was pulling me down a hallway I didn't even recognize, one by one lights were shutting off until the whole placed was immersed in darkness and screams echoed from everywhere. We reached the end of the mysterious hallway and I realized it was where the bitche's office was.

Hadnt been there recently.

"Roxas!" I heard Axel yell snapping me back to reality. "Up!" he said pointing to the window ledge.

I had zero clue what was happening, no clue at all but I jumped up on the ledge as I heard more shattering glass and air piercing screams. The red head followed right after me lifting the tiny handles on at the top of the window.

I felt my breath catch in my throat as the wind came rushing in. I hadn't felt wind in ages. I hadn't even noticed that Axel had jumped out the.

"Roxas!" he yelled his voice sounding strained. That's when she came storming out of her office. My heart stopped it was like seeing a ghost.

"Roxas." She said her voice barely a whisper.

Just then Axel yelled after me again. "Roxas!"

My back faced him as I stared towards her.

"What have you done." She hissed. I could barely make her out in the darkness behind her but the remaining sunlight from outside reflected off her eyes making her look a serpent.

To this day I believe she was the human form of Satan.

"Get down now." She said in the creepy raspy voice.

"Roxas!" Axel yelled again, cold sweat pricked on my skin as I turned to face the window. Axel held his arms out to me and I felt her bony fingers wrap around my ankle.

"You evil fucking bitch!" I spat. "Why. Wont. ." I screamed taking my other leg and kicking her in the face. In the dark I watched as she stumbled back and tripped over some unseen object. As she hit the floor I heard some sickening crack that I now know was only her leg and not her neck. Unfortunately for me.

Jumping out a window was something I had contemplated many times, but my ultimate goal was always to die, not to be caught in the arms of my psychotic boyfriend.

Quickly he dropped me and my feet and we ran like crazy mother fuckers for what felt like years. When we stopped my chest was burning like somebody had lit fire to it, we stared at each other unable to speak as we tried to catch our breath.

We looked at each other. I felt like nothing existed outside of these few seconds, my mind was drawing blanks on everything but it didn't matter.

Without a single word we knew that our pasts were truly forgotten and we could go anywhere from there.

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**A/N: Some what of a good ending? Confused? Theres an epilogue that will hopefully answer all of your questions if you STILL have questions direct them to me I'll help you out. **

**Again thanks a million for the overwhelming support of this story. You're all amazing **


	18. Epilogue

**The official ending. Equipped with answers, its roughly 3 1/2 to 4 years after the ending. **

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Epilogue

I lifted the cigarette to his lips taking a long drag, my eyes scanned her face as I finished.

"Okay, Im confused. So you guys like busted out?" she asked making karate motions.

I nodded. "Well, it was Axel's idea, he kept me out of it. He packed out bags and then had them hidden in the bushes out the window we jumped from."

"But what about the lights and everything?"

"Well the fire alarm was pulled by Namine, which is why she wasn't at dinner, Vanitas was breaking shit everywhere like a mad man trying to keep everybody distracted. Namine was also the one screaming." I shook my head.

"I still can't believe I didn't recognize that scream."

"Alright alright…I still have more questions." Said the black haired girl.

"What about Namine and Vanitas, where are they now?"

"Well, shortly after I left Vanitas turned 18, his parents sent him there as an alternative school option so technically he graduated. He left got a job, and came back for Namine they were on and off for about 3 years and they're engaged last I checked. Right Ax?" I yelled into the kitchen

"Right what?" he yelled back.

"Namine and Vanitas are engaged?"

"Yeah, they are…alright come and eat whatever the fuck this is." He yelled back.

I shook my head as me and Yuffie stood up walking to the kitchen, Axel always yelled that he hated cooking and how bad he was but we couldn't keep him out the kitchen and everything he made was amazing. After we had left that place whose Italian name was long lost in my memory we ran, across cities, states, and regions. Some days were bad, shit, some months were bad. Me and Axel fought a lot of the time, we even broke up once and it was bad because we were living in this really shitty one bedroom apartment. We would take turns sleeping on the floor.

Eventually we settled down in Texas. I know, the city of fucking barns and hay. When we first got here I would throw up about once a week from the hay and straw just floating in the air and have violent panic attacks whenever we drove pass a barn. One time I scratched Axel so hard in the face he bled and then on top of it called him a bitch so sat in our little shack of a house and had two simultaneous breakdowns. Once we finished we went to IHOP. I still had tear stains on my face and Axel had dried blood

We got some looks that night.

Anyway after we settled in we started moving pass our defections we were happier healthier people, we live in the middle of nowhere and have stable jobs.

Axel works in an office, its very suit and tie, he has meetings that sometime keep him for way too long but its okay. I work at the neighborhood elementary school with the kindgergardners which brings us to Yuffie.

Yuffie is the 17 year old sister of one of my students, she runs away. A lot. Her parents can't stand her and in the end she ended staying with me and Axel, we at least got her back in school which is more than her parents could ever do.

Shes a hot tempered bitch.

I know that sounds mean but there is no other way to explain it, she fits in with us. We treat her like an adult and we have mutual respect. When she asked me to tell her about me and Axel the two of us were hesitant it's a pretty messy tale. But one with a happy ending.

Yuffie rubbed her hands together as Axel placed the food that appeared some form of a stir fry in front of her. It smelled great. She sloppily dug in taking large bites.

She also has zero manners.

Everybody has their pasts, nobody is perfect.

But at the end of it all even once you slip over that line, even if you pass the brink of insanity, you can still come back.

Everything can still work.

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**A/N: Do you have a warm fuzzy feeling? I want you to have a warm fuzzy feeling. ANYWAY. If you guys want it, I might do a 3-4 chapter thing about Axel/Roxas time before they setteled down and moved in. IF YOU GUYS WANT. Otherwise Ive got about 8 other started stories sitting on my hard drive. Damn I missed fan fiction.**

Stay wonderful guys

~KHKrazy


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